Craving Control (standard:drama, 3028 words) [2/4] show all parts
Author: Melissa S. Barron	Added: Jul 21 2004	Views/Reads: 2644/1940	Part vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
Chapter 2 * i would love feed back*

Click here to read the first 75 lines of the story

"Are you okay honey?" she asked. 

" Ya, I ummm . . . just forgot my keys." She reached in her jacket, and
pulled out her car keys, with a fake smile spread on her face. 

"Oh, okay . . . you didn't touch your breakfast, are you sure you don't
wanna stay and eat?" 

" Mom I really have to talk with Mrs. Lewis, about our English project
due Friday. So, I'll see you later." 

She hurried past her mom, to avoid further questioning, and drove to
school. 

Her day at school went as usual, boring classes and friends talking to
her. Then at 12:30, the afternoon announcements came on. Same boring 
news, football game Friday, at 7pm, the Williamsburg Wild Cats vs. the 
Darrel Demons. Cadhla always made an appearance at the football games, 
of course she didn't watch much football, it was more of get away from 
home, type of event for her. Then a big announcement came over the 
televison, homecoming was in two weeks! All of the sudden, the room 
filled with chatter and excitement. Fun for them, thought Cadhla. Yes 
she enjoyed buying a pretty dress, getting all fancied up, however that 
also meant that a lot of guys would nag her about being their date. 

She was right, after that class she had gone to her locker and the first
victim stood up to the plate. His name was Dave, he was a senior also, 
wasn't bad looking either. He was nice and tall, muscular, tan, bright 
blue eyes, dark hair that he spiked up, he had a very cute white smile 
too. Every girl, couldn't help but not be some what attracted to him, 
he played in every sport imaginable, and generally was very nice. 
Pretending not to see him, Cadhla shuffled through several books in her 
locker. Dave leaned up against the lockers right next to her, and just 
looked at her up and down, a small grin swept across his face before he 
said a word. 

" Hey Cadhla . . . did you catch the announcements?" he attempted to
create small conversation. 

" Yep" 

" Well, I was wondering, if you wanted to go to Homecoming with me?" Not
once, did she take her eyes out of her locker, and to Dave, this was a 
little strange, however he waited for her answer with patience. When he 
didn't get one, he pressed on. 

" I think would have a blast together, you and I both know that both of
us will get the crown, so why don't we just go together?" 

Annoyed with Dave, Cadhla rolled her eyes and slammed her locker shut.
That is one thing she couldn't stand, men that assumed they would get 
whatever they wanted. She turned around, with such frustration, and 
held her text books close to her. 

" Dave, I appreciate the invite, but we can never be quite certain who
will get the crown. I want my date, to be someone who isn't full of 
himself and only out to get a one nighter. Now, if you excuse me, I'm 
late for Spanish." She turned around, with an evil smirk through her 
lips. Dave just stood there in total disbelief, no one had ever turned 
him down for a date. What was wrong with her? He stood there, for an 
extra minute, and thought maybe she was just having a bad day, that 
maybe he could try later. However, the more he nagged her, the more 
anger she showed. He saw her in the cafeteria, and thought for sure, 
that she wouldn't turn him down in front of all her friends. 

" Dave I am not and nor will I ever be your date, for anything! Leave me
alone!" Cadhla screamed, so annoyed with everyone. 

Surprisingly, he just left, not saying a word. The cafeteria was silent,
and it sent shivers up Cadhla's spine. She couldn't take the stares she 
was drawing, she grabbed her text books, and rushed into the rest room. 
She locked the stall and threw her books to her feet. Once again, tears 
were falling, why she asked herself? She had done nothing wrong, it was 
Dave's fault for being a jerk. For some reason, though she said these 
things to herself, they didn't stop the tears. Then suddenly, her mind 
was screaming LEAVE NOW! She opened the stall, scooped up her books and 
ran toward the school's back doors. Without a moments hesitation, she 
opened the door and ran for her car. Her hands shaking, she knew 
someone had to have seen her leave, she turned the key, and just drove 
off. She had never disobeyed school rules, ever and now she wasn't 
quite sure why she did this, or where she should go now. No one was 
home now, so she decided to stop at home, just for a little bit. 

She decided to take a bubble bath, something to relax her. However, it
didn't work, she once again had a memory flash before her eyes. She was 
a freshman at the age of fifteen, she had decided to go to a party, one 
that a friend was having. She knew, that everyone would be there, 
Jamie's parents were out of town, and this enabled anything to take 
place. She remembered, that there were a lot of guys there, although 
they were all cute, only one stood out in her mind at that time. His 
name was Matt, he was a sophomore, one grade higher then her. He had 
short brown hair, and jet black eyes, she just loved his cute little 
goatee and admired his muscles, that he got from lifting weights in 
gym. He was just standing around, looking at all the girls at the 
party. Cadhla had been staring at him from across the room and 
whispering to Jamie how hot she thought he was. Cadhla was always very 
attractive . . . so when their eyes finally met he knew he liked her. 
They just stood on opposite sides of the room, in a daze, for Cadhla it 
had been like time had stopped and the only people in that room were 
the two of them. He strolled over to her, all of her friends cleared 
the way and just watched in amazement and wonder, at how Cadhla always 
got the men. 

" Your name's Cadhla, right?" She remembered him asking. 

" Yep, just call me Cad." She replied with a smile. 

Then all of the sudden, he handed her a beer, she just stood there
looking at the icy can that he was holding out. Part of her, was scared 
and nervous, this was what people warned you about, just say no. 
However, the other side told her, this is the man you have been looking 
for, you've tasted beer before and it's only one can. Don't be a wuss, 
just drink one can with him, he'll think you're cool and you will win. 
She took the can from Matt, popped the tab, and took a big gulp. Her 
friends watched this, yes Jamie did set beer out, but she didn't think 
Cad would dare to take any. So all of her friends, decided that they 
should drink too. That one can of beer that she had, quickly turned 
into four, and before you knew it everyone at that party was drunk. She 
remembered Matt whispering in her ear, to go upstairs, that they needed 
to talk. Being drunk, she didn't think anything of it and he took her 
hand, and lead her up the stairs, to one of the many bedrooms. They 
both sat down on the bed . . . he was saying things to her, but she 
couldn't remember what they were. What he did after that, she saw, bits 
and pieces flash before her eyes. He had kissed her, then went down her 
neck, and the next thing she knew, she was naked, wrapped up in a 
sheet, a note lying beside her. 

Cad, I had a lot of fun, thanks. I hope you know that, we were just
having a little bit of fun, and that it meant nothing. You are a great 
girl, but I don't want a relationship. I'll see ya at school. Matt 

She remembered that note, as if she had kept it all these years, but she
hadn't. After reading it, she realized what had happened. She had let 
some hot guy, get her drunk, and take advantage of her. She was so 
scared, she felt so stupid, that she had let a man take control of her. 
She gripped the pillow tightly, and cried and screamed. She tore the 
note in pieces and threw it on the floor, it was 8am, she was supposed 
to be home by ten last night! Her mom had to be worried sick, what 
would she tell her? She remembered getting dressed, and rushing to get 
Jamie. She told Jamie what had happened and asked for her brother to 
give her a ride home. 

After thanking Jamie and her brother, she walked into the house. There,
sitting on the couch drinking a cup of coffee was her mother. She 
didn't look up, didn't say a word, just waiting for Cadhla to open her 
mouth with an excuse. 

"Hi Mom, sorry I didn't come home, I was tired and just decided to spend
the night there." 

She took one glance up at her daughter, and knew that she was hiding
something. She just thought, that she should let it slide, thinking 
that if it were bad enough, Cadhla would come to her for some comfort. 
" Cad, I'm very disappointed, that you didn't call me, luckily, Jamie 
called me." 

Cadhla's heart jumped up to her throat, what had Jamie said? Maybe her
mom knew and was testing to see if she would tell her herself. Thinking 
these thoughts, she just said yup I told her too, and her mom just let 
things slip by. 

" Well Cad, I have lots of things to do today, and Sara is over her
friend's house for the night, so the house is your's today." She 
grabbed her coat, climbed in the car and drove off. 

Well by now, Cadhla fell asleep in the tub, and the memory still haunted
her dreams. She saw herself, as her mom drove off running to her room, 
crying so humiliated. She took out her notebook, which at the time, she 
hid in her closet. She then, began to write sitting on what she called 
the "window seat." In her room, there was a big window that looked out 
to the far distant hills in her backyard, and in front of the window, 
there was a step that she sat on, when she really needed to think and 
just let her soul out of it's shell. By the morning light glittering 
through the window, she wrote, letting what happened the night before 
out of her mind, and let it pour through the pen, onto paper. 

Never Forget 

I'll never forget those dark eyes, as they took over me. Never forget,
the strong feelings I had for you, that others could clearly see. I'll 
never forget, how you made me feel, Always asking myself, if you were 
real. Never forget that kiss, that took my breath away, Never forget 
the wish, that you would stay. It was me you took advantage of, Me , 
thinking that what we did should have been out of love. That special 
moment, you took away, you didn't even care. Now when I look back, all 
I can remember, above me was your devious stare. Never will I forget, 
what I felt for you, Never will I forget how I wanted you to stay and 
say you loved me too. 

It was then, when she saw herself close the book, that she woke up in
the tub. Freezing, she climbed out of the tub, got dressed and walked 
over to her mirror. She saw the image of her, through grade school, 
that kiss that Ryan gave her flashed. Then all of the sudden, dark jet 
black eyes flashed moments later, looking down upon her, that night, 
when she was only fifteen, that image had haunted her ever since. She 
then was brought back to the present, and banged her fists in anger at 
the mirror. She ran to the bathroom, tripping over various things along 
the way. She lifted the lid, on the toilet, pulled back her hair, and 
crammed her hand down her throat. Letting herself puke what very little 
was in her stomach. When she was finished, she put the lid down, and 
sat down, holding her head, as she cried. Then she stopped, and 
thoughts popped in her mind, causing her to take everything in, every 
emotion. Anger, hatred, sadness, then all of the sudden a new emotion 
came to mind, one that she never thought was possible when she was sad. 
That was happiness, she felt more control, when she caused herself to 
puke, it was something that she felt she had control over, that no one 
could find out, no one could say that's not good enough. She didn't 
know what caused her to cram her hand down her throat, but now she felt 
like she had power. She thought to herself, that this was a way to lose 
weight fast enough, a way to gain control, a way to let all her anger 
out by causing herself to puke. Then after, though she would be upset 
before she puked, after she would finally get what she wants HAPPINESS. 
That was it, the dark stages of her life begun. 


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