|I am so glad I am not you (standard:Creative non-fiction, 1024 words)|
|Author: kathyg||Added: Jun 15 2015||Views/Reads: 2598/1283||Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)|
|I have heard this sentence many times in my life. It is not easy to hear but it has made me stronger for proving people wrong about me. A true personal account of how to cope with "friends" that stab you in the back and how to find your voice.|
I am not ordinary by any means! I have heard the sentence, "I am so glad I am not you", so many times it makes my head spin! Friends are very important to me but I have been double crossed so many times that I am reluctant to keep many. Let me give you a few examples to help you understand me. I believe I was a well adjusted kid until I hit about 4th grade. I had a run in with a nun who stopped me cold in the cafeteria because she thought I was chewing gum. She grabbed me and demanded I spit out the gum into the garbage can. I said I had no gum and then she grabbed me, spun me upside down and threw me in the garbage can along with the imaginary gum I was chewing! Later on, in religion class, she made me stand up while she proclaimed I was the biggest liar she ever met and that I swallowed the gum!" The whole class was laughing at me and I took my books and left, humiliated. I walked home and told my mother who actually believed me! She took me out of that school and from that day forward. I was a public school kid (at least for a few more years). I walked around leary of metal garbage cans and nuns. Before that I liked nuns but that nun was rogue. At public school, I knew two kids from my neighborhood and we used to play together before but when I went to public school everything changed! These two former friends started to play tricks on me and give me the silent treatment, start dumb rumors about me to get the other kids to hate me too. The more they rejected me, the more I tried harder to be their friend. I brought candy, games, etc., but it made me the bigger fool. Whatever they were telling the other kids I didn't have a clue but it worked. I had no friends. I was miserable and shy. The one thing I did have was spunk! No matter how much they pushed me down, I picked myself up somehow! One day I wrote a song and asked the teacher if I could sing it in front of the class. She said ok so I started singing! I have a good voice but the kids laughed at me. I kept singing. I did not care. I like to sing. A week later one kid said, "I am so glad I am not you. Nobody likes you but you do sing well." I asked, "Do you want to be my friend?" "No." My life was mostly lonely after that. I went to junior high running home from school, chased by kids that hated me, being thrown in my locker, having my bra snapped in gym class, you name it, they did it. I never fought back and I don't know why. I lost my will and my voice. One boy called me "skinks" what ever that means. He said I had no personality. He shouted it everytime I walked down the hall. I could hear kids whisper, "I am so glad I am not her." Public school turned out to be the same as Catholic school. Rotten! My catholic school closed and all the brats that attended there showed up at the public school. I recognized a few in my English class. I was getting straight A's in all my subjects because the work was so easy! One day this girl named Debbie put a note on my desk. It read: "Everyone hates you! I am so glad I am not you!" I got my books, walked out of class to the guidance office with the note. They sent me to another section and things went better for a while. My father wanted to send me to a private school but by then my anxiety of school in general was so great I hardly ever left the house. My turning point was art class where I was able to express my frustration with the human race in painting. I was also able to write my feeling out in words. These same words, "I am so glad I am not you", burn in my heart and mind Click here to read the rest of this story (43 more lines)
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