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Mux is a Moron (standard:humor, 3179 words)
Author: The man in the lead codpieceAdded: Sep 25 2000Views/Reads: 2845/1425Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
Mux was always a loser. Come and watch him screw up again.

Click here to read the first 75 lines of the story

night I silently find my bed. The dark closes in, and I feel okay.  The 
blankets are warm, and the heater is humming some mechanical ditty from 
behind the door.  It's far away now. Mux stands alone on the open 
plains of his mind.  The sun rises quickly, and settles itself gently 
into the eastern sky. "Hello Mux," the wind says with a sigh. "GARG," I 
yawp with all the despair, and confusion I can muster.  The cry echoes 
off the far away hills. "What's the matter?" the sweet wind is warm, 
and it sooths Mux to a point.  "What is so wrong with me?"     There is 
an answer, but I don't hear it. ***     I grind my teeth a bit, and 
then realize that it is pointless, so I stop.  "I just don't 
understand," I explain, "It's not like I am expecting anything back..." 
"I just don't feel comfortable accepting things from other people." 
Mina grabbed the check and headed for the counter. "But, but, but," I 
followed her, flailing my arms in a futile attempt to gain control, "I 
want to pay."     "No!" "How about I pay for the check, and you pick up 
the tip." "I'm paying, Mux." she rolled her eyes. I grabbed my flannel 
off the back of my chair, and flung it onto my shoulders.  "Ugh!  Fine! 
 Be that way..." "I will," she smiled.  Her face lit the room in a 
golden light, and it was all I could do to keep from melting into a 
puddle of Mux upon the floor. She turned away and paid for their meal.  
I took a twenty out of my wallet, and I palmed it.  As she finished 
paying, I opened the door.  She walked past, and thanked me.  I tried 
to slip the bill into her pocket to no avail.  She squirmed, and 
twisted her body around. "I don't want your money," she said.  Why does 
she have to be like that?  What does she think, that I will expect 
something out of her?  Why won't she tell me what she thinks... I want 
to know her better...     "Mux." I started walking to her car.  The 
night was cool.  It would get colder, winter was coming.  Her passenger 
door stuck, so I pulled hard.  It opened with a pop.  I sat down.  She 
got in, started her car, and we began our journey to my house. "Someday 
I'm going to do something right, I'm sure of it, I just want to be 
there when it happens."     "Stop bashing yourself, Mux." "Well, it's 
just that I'm such an easy target.  What am I supposed to do anyway, 
say how perfect I am?  I always screw everything up.  I piss off my 
friends, I disappoint my family, and you hate me." "I don't hate you, I 
could never hate you"     "You don't love me though." "I don't want to 
love anyone.  I just don't want complications." "Ah."  Oh well, at 
least dinner was good.  Why do I always do this?  I talk too much.  I 
don't see how she can do it... not care, I mean.  She knows I would do 
anything for her.  The car came to a stop at my house, and I got out.  
"M'bye." "See ya."  The bug zapper buzzed annoyingly by my head.  I 
watched the car go. There was a loud pop as another insect met his 
fate.  I skulked into the darkness until I found my door.  The screen 
door clacked noisily as I entered my home.  I grabbed a cookie from the 
cupboard and devoured it. "Night, dad," I said to the door of my 
father's room. I went into my own room, clicked on the light, and 
closed the door.  I threw my clothes off.  Ugh, I thought as I put on 
my sweat pants, what is so wrong with me?  I climbed onto my bunk bed 
and stared at the ceiling about five inches from my nose.  I pulled the 
chain to turn off my light.  I pulled my blankets tighter to my body.  
I blinked.  I blinked again, slowly. This time I didn't open my eyes. 
The air was moist, and the moon sparkled off the black streets.  I 
stepped in a puddle, but I didn't notice.  It must have just rained. 
Strange, I don't remember it raining.  My thoughts were interrupted by 
the sound of a car.  I turned.  The car was blue.  A Chrystler.  Mina 
laughed in the driver's seat at some unheard joke made by the 
passenger.  I saw her eyes.  They were like everything and nothing 
wrapped in a ribbon of brown-green.  Her braces shone with the light of 
the stars.  The passenger was Zeebo.  He was saying something that I 
couldn't hear.  The car passed and sped away. I walked alone along the 
street.  I have to do something to get my mind off of Mina.  She 
doesn't love me, I have to stop loving her. "I have something that will 
take your mind off her," said the man in black.  "It's on the hill, 
just look for it."  He chuckled to himself as he disappeared into the 
trees. I walked for a while until I found the hill.  A pile of paper 
was laying in the wet grass.  Upon closer examination, I found that 
they were all letters to Mina. The one on top was from me. But I 
couldn't read what it said.  Why are all these sitting out in the rain. 
 How is this supposed to take my mind off... "It's time to wake up 
now," my dad's voice.  The lights flashed on. "It is too early," I 
groaned.  I jumped off my bunk, stumbled into the closet door, 
corrected myself, and stormed into the bathroom.  The door slammed 
behind me.  The cold floor froze my feet.  I threw my clothes to the 
floor, and stubbed my toe on the shower.  I muttered obscenities as I 
began to turn the left knob.  HOT!  I reversed the rotation of the left 
knob, simultaneously turning up the right.  AAAGH, COLD!  I jumped out 
of the shower, and slipped on the linoleum.  As I sat on the floor, and 
listened to the spraying shower mock me, I decided that today was going 
to be one of those days. I got up and turned the shower off.  I 
adjusted the knobs and tested the temperature with my hand.  I stepped 
in cautiously.  Perfect.  I hummed some annoying tune that for some 
reason was now stuck in my ear.  When I finished my cleansing ritual, I 
dried off and went to my room.  I picked out some clothes and slid into 
them.  Jeans and a tee-shirt, who'd of thunk it? I grabbed my backpack, 
an apple, and a cheap Smith's Cola out of the fridge. It was time for 
my trek to prison.  It was Monday.  School starts in a half an hour.  I 
shivered on my doorstep for a second, then I took a step toward the 
high school.  Then another.  About 20 minutes later I was there. Ugh.  
I went in one of the glass doors that separated me from the inmates. I 
walked around the halls amid the constant chatter coming from all 
around. The bell  rang, and I was corralled to my first period class.  
Four periods later my brain woke up.  I said hello to Zeebo as we 
exited the glass doors, and walked to his house.  Lunch time.  Freaky 
Bob said something about carrots, but no one paid attention.  Toad 
whined about something Chicken Boy said.  Our group was an ever 
shifting blob as we migrated to Zeebo's for lunch. ***     "I'm not 
good enough at anything," I explained as I slopped some mayo onto a 
piece of white bread. "You just need to have more self confidence."  
Zeebo opened his mouth and inserted a sandwich. "But there are so many 
more people who are better than me." I finished making my sandwich and 
began devouring it.     "Better at what?" "Better at a bunch of stuff.  
Better for Mina.  She will never love me because I'm just not good 
enough." "Oh, poor baby," Alex whined sarcastically.  I wondered what a 
fork would look like if it were embedded into his skull.  I grunted. 
"You only think they are better than you.  You need to think better of 
yourself."     "I guess," I moaned. "It's time to go," said Toad.  We 
all grabbed our bags and headed back to school.  "Do you like Mina?" I 
asked Zeebo.     "Just as a friend." "M'kay..."  I guess they are 
right. I'm good enough.  People have told me that I'm cute.  I have as 
much right as anyone to love her.  I have more of a right to!  Because 
I love her more than anyone else could.  I charged through the rest of 
the day, and when the bell rang I marched to the video store where Mina 
works.  I strode confidently up to the counter.  She was on the phone.  
What was I doing?  I took a step back. She said goodbye and hung up the 
phone.  I backed up another step.  She turned and saw me. "Hi," she 
said cheerfully.  She saw me. I couldn't go now. The sweat sprayed off 
my forehead.  I sloshed through the puddles until I was at the counter 
again.  "Aye dere," I said weakly.  I looked around. The place was 
empty except for the two of us.  "I had a dream about you." "What 
about?" her eyebrows raised in a breathtaking manor.  She leaned 
forward on the counter.     "Um, nothing." "You know what Zeebo told 
me?" She paused long enough for me to think I was supposed to say 
something. "He said that when he told you that he asked me out and I 
told him no, he said that you said that losers like you don't stand a 
chance." A couple words lodges sideways in my ear.  They blocked the 
way and jumbled up the rest.  I shook my head to sort them out.  
"What... wait... what?" "When he asked my out, and I said no..." "Wait, 
wait, wait," I interrupted, "he asked you out?" "Yeah he said that he 
told you..."     "What!?!?! When was this?" "A while ago.  A few 
weeks." "I said that... but he never told me THAT!"     "Well..." "He 
lied to me." "He must have lied to me too because he told me that he 
told you." "But I asked him if he liked you, and he said just as a 
friend." "Don't be mad at him, he can't control how he feels." "Oh, but 
you can?"     "What is that supposed to mean?" "You say that you might 
consider liking John, but you aren't sure." "That's just an 
infatuation."     "But what the hell is wrong with me?" "What... what 
do you mean?"     "I love you, so why can't you love me?" "You don't 
have what I'm looking for in a guy." "And what, pray tell, are you 
looking for?" "Self esteem, pride, confidence..." "So you are looking 
for them to not be me!"     There was a pause. I looked at the floor. 
"Not to brag, but I have turned down a quarterback from..." "What is 
that supposed to make you so special?" Anger rose in her voice. "... 
and people say that we were a good match, and we probably would have 
been." "But it's impossible, because there can only be one person for 
anyone, and I'm the right one for you.  If I don't have what you are 
looking for, you must be looking for the wrong things.  "I love you 
more than anything. I love you more than I love my own life.  IF YOU 
CAN'T SEE THAT YOU MUST BE BLIND!"     "SHUT UP!" she said.  She was 
really pissed off. Crap.  "I always do this..."     "Yes you do..." "I 
always say the wrong things..."     "Yep." "And I always piss people 
off." There was a silence.  I looked up. "I'm sorry..." "You are not!  
You always shoot your mouth off and say what ever you feel like, and 
you always say you're sorry afterwards."     "I'm..." "Just go away."   
  "But, wait... I just..." "GO!"  I left.  Outside the video store life 
went on as usual.*** The next day I went to school.  I dragged my body 
around the school to each of my classes until I finally got to Study 
Hall.  The last period of the day.  I laid my head down and quickly 
nodded off. "Mux," bellowed some drooling mass from the table behind 
me, "you are a freak!"     I leapt from my spot and in a single deft 
movement had him hog tied with his own tongue.  The school laughed.  I 
took a bow. The bell rang and I woke up.  A puddle of drool was on the 
table where my head was.  I looked behind me.  The jock sit quite 
un-hog-tied at the table behind me.  Strange, I thought.     I grabbed 
my backpack and walked home. The End


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