|Called Your Name (standard:romance, 580 words)|
|Author: Sare||Added: Nov 25 2001||Views/Reads: 2108/1||Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)|
|"If you call, I will answer..."|
I called your name in my sleep last night. They said that Iíd be lying peacefully, and then a dream would come mumbling along across my lips and your name with it, clearly articulated. I laughed in embarrassment when they told me this morning, because along with the telling came a spate of questions about who you were and why I dreamt about you so much? I could only tell them that you were a friend and that Iíd been thinking of you before I fell asleep. That last part is true enough, at least. Laying there in the darkness, away from home for a rather unpleasant purpose, my brother on a cot off to my right, my father and stepmother on my left in the next bed. I lay there wishing and imagining that you were there with me, almost laughing at the absurdity of the idea. In the arms of my secret lover I sleep across from my parents...ha, ha. At the church service I read a poem I had written. Afterwards there was a queue of little old ladies who wanted to tell me how wonderful it was, and they all wanted to know all about me - what was I studying at university? How many years left? How old was I? I noticed them looking at and feeling my left hand. No ring. Did I have a boyfriend? many of them asked. I said no. I felt myself blush a little inside at the conscious ďlieĒ. Well, youíre not my boyfriend, exactly, are you? Was I going to tell them about my cyber-lover, the man Iím head-over-heels in love with but have never laid eyes on, whose words have filled me with love, anger, sadness, desire, but whose voice I have never heard? Whose fingers have touched me in such intimate ways, but whose arms havenít yet enclosed me? I almost sound defensive now, but I donít feel that way. I would be happy to tell them about you, about the stunning beauty of your words, your mind, your heart, about the fantabulous complexity of your spirit. But itís such a delicious secret to keep, it sends shoots of comfort to enwrap my heart and tingles of pleasure through my whole body. I delight in the knowing of our secret. I want to share your sunshine with the world, and yet I ache to clutch you to me and never let go; not for any person, not for any memory, not for any ocean will I let you go, until you no longer want to be held. We both have things to do, lives to live. Only time will tell if we are ships passing in the dark, or a pair of swans, to be together forever. Until that time comes I will wait. I will wait for you to be ready, I will wait for the time to be right. But do not imagine that I will wait quietly. I called your name in my sleep last night. Now Iím awake, and Iím calling it again. ***** With all that I am, and all that I will be, I love you, my warrior. ***** "I think it's getting to the point where I can be myself again; I think it's getting to the point where we have almost made amends; I think it's the getting to the point that is the hardest part... and if you call, I will answer..." Barenaked Ladies, "Call and Answer". Tweet
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