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The bear at the church (standard:horror, 368 words)
Author: stanley mcqueen kentucky backwoods writerAdded: Apr 15 2007Views/Reads: 2480/0Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
humor in a country setting

Stanley Ray Mcqueen, Kentucky 

The other day a gentleman told me about a fellow who has a bad habit of
telling lies ...... He joined a church and the preacher knew he had 
been noted as being very bad to tell lies ...... The untruthful fellow 
would get mad when he told someone a lie and they wouldn't believe him 
...... Well, the preacher met him at the porch of the church house 
where everyone had gathered just to chat a spell before the service, 
and the good pastor had a good sense of humor, so he thought to mess 
with the new member who was noted as a liar ...... "Well, well, Slim," 
says the preacher, "We all missed you not being here Sunday. Where were 
you last Sunday?" ...... "Well, preacher, I had some work that needed 
doing real bad so I missed to catch up on my work," answered Slim 
...... "Well, you missed the awfulest thing that ever happened here at 
the church," replied the preacher ...... "What happened?" asked the 
curious Slim ...... "Well," said the preacher, "I was up behind the 
altar preaching my heart out when the door of the church suddenly 
busted open and through it comes a big black bear ...... And right 
behind the bear was a wee little Mexican dog ...... That dog was biting 
and tearing at that bear like a wildcat would do a dog, and this might 
be hard to believe," said the serious-looking preacher, "that dog 
killed that big grizzly bear right before all the Good Saints' eyes, 
and it was a sure kill, I tell you, Slim, that bear was killed 
graveyard-dead, sure enough," explains the preacher ...... "I know this 
will be hard for you to believe," repeats the preacher ...... "Oh, no 
it won't," says Slim ...... "Well, why won't it be?" asked the preacher 
...... "Well, that's easy," says Slim. "That was my dog that killed 
that bear" ...... All the folks laughed, and as usual, Slim got real 
mad, and leaped off the church stoop, madder than blazes because they 
laughed at his lies. 



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