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|A Dream About You? (standard:other, 5423 words)|
|Author: The St. John Lady||Added: Jan 28 2009||Views/Reads: 1229/668||Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)|
|I just can't help but dream of you. You ignite my passionate fire and make me feel things I was not prepared for. The nights I have wished I could tell you how I feel, the days I have wished you felt the same!|
All characters and ideas are copyright to Nicky D Sarti 2009. I have this dream about you, well to be honest it is more about “us” rather than anything else; but I guess you already knew that right. I am not going to lie and tell you that you are the only man I have thought about in this way, nor am I going to tell you that you are the one; we both know that most of that would be false. I have too much respect for you to lie to you; I would never forgive myself if I were not one hundred per cent honest with you. However, the one thing that seems to be different about my dreams is you! You seem to haunt them constantly, always present like an old faithful memory or guardian angel. But it is not just that though is it, I mean never before in my life have my dreams ever seemed so; well real. When I close my eyes, it is as if I can feel you standing there right in front of me. And maybe that is where all these problems are coming from, maybe this is why I cannot be around you too long anymore; maybe this is the reason we cannot do the friend thing. Maybe I am afraid, yeah that is it; I am afraid. Afraid that you will see though me, through my act; afraid that you will read my feelings. You were always good at that; always able to see through the façade that is my life. All the times I spent trying to hide and you easily saw through it, and I would always wonder how you managed it. I guess I am afraid of the answers if I asked that question you always made me feel like I could ask, maybe I am better off not knowing. You told me that I did not need to run or act, you taught me to look out for the simple things in life and that those trials in life would only make me stronger. But I am not as strong or as positive as you, I have been through too much to start believing that it will all be okay in the end. Not that I do not want things to be okay, I am tired of things not being okay. You gave me some belief that things would be okay, you must have known that your kind words would make me fall. I spend many a match thinking about you, if I was being honest it is not just match days I think about you. You seem to be in my dreams and thoughts every single day, but whatever the case; your kindness makes me fall even more. So in honesty it is not that hard to see why this dream happened, I guess the only thing that is hard to understand; well for me anyway, is why it was not real. The thoughts and memories were so clear and so strong that I have no idea where reality starts and make believe ends, maybe this is the problem in the end; maybe this is why I must leave. Blankly I stare at the letter in my hands, I must have done this for the past thirty minutes; but in all honesty it only seems like a few seconds. Everything in my mind is screaming at me to rip the letter up and walk away, most of my friends had already warned me of this; begging me to just let it drop. But as was always my way, I just needed to get closure on things; I could not just walk away. There would always be that little part of me that wondered; what if... and that part would always be the ruling factor in anything I did, I just knew it. In my dreams I am sat at the same bar with the same letter in my hands, but as I close my eyes I know my dream is going to be different; it always is. In my mind you have always had feelings for me, but due to the being married bit and never knowing I felt the same; could never (or rather would never) say anything to me. In my dreams, somehow you become separated etc. Yes, I know that sucks and I know I am probably being hypocritical there; but I am not perfect... even in my dreams! For some reason, either you have confronted me or I have decided to finally say something to you. I do not even remember how I tell you, let alone when I tell you; but all I know is that one minute I am struggling to tell you and the next you have kissed me! Okay I know it is daft, but I know that I am sat here blushing slightly as the thoughts of kissing you passes though my mind. I feel like a lovesick teenager with a schoolgirl crush as I think of your first tender touches, my mind enjoying the fact I know you will be a gentleman. Despite the beard your lips are soft and tender, you kiss me slowly and gently; not wanting to force me but not wishing to stop either. From my point of view I feel like my hands are not doing the right thing, just Click here to read the rest of this story (400 more lines)
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