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Cultivating the fine art of casual loafing (standard:Inspirational stories, 902 words)
Author: GodspenmanAdded: Oct 17 2011Views/Reads: 1344/704Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
Storm clouds were brewing like fresh morning coffee in the normally placid parsonage this past week. I will not say that things got out of hand, which is not to say they did not. I just will not say.

Storm clouds were brewing like fresh morning coffee in the normally
placid parsonage this past week. I will not say that things got out of 
hand, which is not to say they did not. I just will not say. 

I sensed a growing controversy between my wife and myself. Its genesis
came about because of some silly mix-up, I assure you. Usually, mix-ups 
come about because of some misunderstanding and boy, do I sure miss my 
understanding. I have misplaced mine for so long I honestly cannot 
remember when I had it last. 

If my memory serves me, and it has not to date, the last time I had a
glimpse of my understanding, I was standing at some altar repeating the 
words, “I do.” After that, life has been a glorious blur. 

The faux pas between us simply was a matter of attitude. My better half
took the high road and I, per usual, took the low road. The reason I 
take the low road is simply that when I fall, and falling for me is 
inevitable, I do not have far to plummet. 

Regrettably, this past week we experienced a clash of attitudes. 

I can sum up my attitude in life quite nicely: Never do today what can
be put off until tomorrow. Who knows? I may forget the whole thing by 
then, something I am renowned for around the parsonage, if you know 
what I mean. 

On the other hand, my life's companion firmly believes in doing things
ahead of time. For instance, by the end of August all her Christmas 
shopping is finished, wrapped and stored in the garage waiting for the 
Christmas tree. 

She has a wonderful knack for planning. What I want to know is how does
she know if I am going to be naughty or nice? 

Usually, I give in to my better half. After all, that is what a great
marriage is all about; give and take. As a dutiful husband, I take 
everything she gives me. 

This time, however, an important principle was at stake. Some things in
life are worth fighting for and this represented one of those times. 

For years, I have suffered from a condition known as Afternoon Siesta
Syndrome. Each afternoon I stretch out for an hour of rest. In that 
hour, I meditate on some of the more important issues of life. 

I cannot tell you how many significant problems I have resolved during
my daily afternoon forty winks. I say I can't tell you not because I 
don't want to, but when aroused from my snooze I can't remember the 

All I know is that somewhere in the recesses of my mind are wonderful
resolutions to some of the most intricate problems facing our world 
today. In this regard, I do not know how often my wife has said to me, 
“You need to see a psychiatrist.” 

This leads me to the subject of our difference this past week. I am a
firm believer in the “Art of Casual Loafing.” 

Loafing gets such a bad rap because so many amateurs try their hand at
it. Let me say right here that loafing is definitely not for the 
inexperienced. A level of skill and expertise that only comes from 
diligent practice. 

Personally, I have invested over 50 years in the Art of Casual Loafing,
which qualifies me as some sort of an expert on the subject. I am a 
proud, card-carrying member of the ACL union. I could have been elected 
president but we have not got around to elections yet. Many, and when I 
say many, I am especially including my companion, take loafing as 
something that comes rather easy. 

Oh, quite contraire, Mon Frére. Nothing could be further from the truth.

My spouse thinks loafing is a tragic waste of time. She thinks things
need doing in a timely fashion, like "right now." 

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