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The Conqueror (standard:non fiction, 2150 words)
Author: Bentley LynnAdded: Sep 21 2003Views/Reads: 3070/2173Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
A true story . . . on September 29, 1994, my life changed; my son Victor was born. Victor brought things out in me, things I never knew I had . . .
 



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once.  I couldn't clean well enough, I wasn't pretty enough, I was 
fatter than a cow, I was lazy and as a wife, well I just didn't compare 
to his friends' wives.  I kept hoping that when the baby came that he 
would change, become a wonderful father and husband, we would be a 
family. 

The day before my son was born, John took me to the doctors for my last
checkup.  I was four days overdue and I could barely move.  My doctor 
wanted to admit me that night so that I could be induced early the next 
morning.  My doctor, my friend Arus, he knew what John did to me and 
begged me many times to leave him, he told John that if he tried to 
keep him from admitting me he would turn him in; John backed down and 
allowed me to stay the night.  He told me before he left not to talk to 
anyone and to call him after the baby was born.  I was relieved that 
Arus was able to admit me; I needed some time to catch up on sleep, 
time to rest my ballooned feet and hands.  Arus stayed with me for a 
while, holding my hand and telling me what a strong and wonderful 
person I was, he made me smile and laugh, things that I hadn't done in 
a long time.  I tried to convince Arus that once the baby came things 
would be different, John would love this baby and he would change.  I 
think I was trying to convince myself. 

The next morning at seven, Arus induced my labor.  The pain was
unbearable, my back felt like it was going to shatter in to tiny pieces 
from all the pressure, the pain coming from between my legs reminded me 
of the many times John had kicked me there.  Arus had told me months 
before that I was having a boy and the only thing I could think about 
was that the men in my life did nothing but cause me pain.  What had I 
done to them?  Am I that awful that they wanted me to suffer?  Oh, God, 
I can't do this; I don't want to hurt anymore.  I don't want to do 
this!  I didn't realize that I was actually saying these things out 
loud.  The nurses tried to calm me down and Arus kept telling me that 
it was normal to have this kind of pain.  Normal?  It's normal to be 
hurt by men?  At that moment, I realized that my life was only going to 
get worse.  John would turn this baby boy against me and they would 
hurt me forever.  He was coming and there was nothing I could do to 
stop it!  He was ready to enter this world and hurt me, just like his 
father.  I just wanted all the pain to stop. 

Ten hours in to labor, Arus told me that I was progressing but the baby
wasn't, he would have to do a cesarean section.  Oh great, just what I 
need, another scar to prove to someone that I love them.  But, there 
was no other way, it had to be done or else the baby could die.  So 
Arus performed the cesarean section and delivered my son, my beautiful, 
amazing baby boy.  Victor is what we had agreed to name him; it means 
'The Conqueror'.  That's what he would be-'The Conqueror'.  Maybe he 
wouldn't hurt me.  Maybe he would protect me.  How could these ten 
little fingers curl up in to a fist and hurt me?  His beautiful head 
full with shiny, soft black hair, that little button nose and perfectly 
shaped lips that seemed too small to open up and yell hateful things at 
me and tell me what a terrible person I am.  And those tiny feet, how 
cute they are, they couldn't possibly be strong enough to kick me until 
I passed out from pain. 

John arrived at the hospital the next day ready to take me home.  He
told me I had been there too long and that there were things to do at 
home.  Victor was in the nursery and John didn't even ask about him, I 
don't think he cared.  "Don't you want to see Victor?" I asked him.  "I 
will see him later", he said.  He began to throw my things in the bag 
and then grabbed my arm to pull me out of bed.  He pulled my arm so 
hard, I thought it came out of socket and I felt a pain shoot from my 
stomach and down between my legs.  I screamed!  The nurse and Arus came 
running in and saw John standing over me with his hand still resting on 
my arm.  Arus threatened to call the police if he didn't get his hands 
off of me.  John released his grip on my arm and began to explain that 
it was time for me to go, I had things to do and now with the baby 
coming home, there was no time to sit around.  Just then another nurse 
came in with Victor and she asked John if he wanted to hold him; to my 
surprise he said yes.  The nurse gently picked up Victor from the 
rolling cradle and John yanked him from the nurse so fast her mouth 
dropped open.  I became very nervous; my heart started beating so fast. 
 "Don't hurt him!" I screamed at John.  I couldn't explain my feelings. 
 I had never felt that way before.  "Give him back!" I yelled at him.  
I couldn't breathe.  What is wrong with me?  I tried to get up but the 
pain in my stomach kept me from moving.  I wanted my baby.  "Give him 
to me now!  I don't want you here!  Get out!"  Arus took Victor and 
placed him in my arms.  I showered his head with kisses and held him 
close to me.  No one will ever hurt my baby.  He is mine!  This 
precious little boy is mine.  John began to yell at me and tell me I 
was worthless, if Victor stayed with me that he would be worthless, 
that we were nothing without him, and then he left.  All I could do was 
cry. 

Arus kept me in the hospital for five days; he was concerned about what
would happen to me when I went home.  But, I wasn't concerned; I was 
ready for a change.  I had already contacted John's commanding officer, 
Colonel Sykes.  He agreed to come and see me and when he arrived I told 
him everything; I explained in detail the beatings that I received and 
made to keep hidden.  Arus stayed during our discussion and 
corroborated my story.  I pleaded with Colonel Sykes to help me get 
John out of the house so I could bring Victor home.  He offered to 
escort me home and speak with John.  When we arrived John went 
ballistic!  He said that I was a liar, that I was just trying to get 
attention, but Colonel Sykes did what he promised; he took John to the 
base and put him the dorms. 

The next day I filed charges against John.  Everyone was surprised at my
strength; I was even surprised.  My strength came from my son; he 
needed me to take care of him, to feed him, to clothe him, to protect 
him.  But how was I supposed to protect him if I couldn't even protect 
myself?  I vowed never to let anyone hurt me that way again and I would 
make sure that no one ever hurt my son.  'The Conqueror' and I would be 
just fine on our own. 


   


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