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It Never Dawned on Me Until (standard:humor, 903 words)
Author: GodspenmanAdded: Aug 21 2022Views/Reads: 130/69Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
If I rely on my “own understanding” I won’t be able to afford the direction I will be going.

I must confess I am too poor to pay attention at this time in my life. I
hope one day I will win the lottery and be able to afford to pay 
attention. But, of course, The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage says 
that you can't win a lottery unless you play the lottery. Well, I don't 
play the lottery. Sigh! 

I guess I will have to find another way to raise enough money to pay
attention. Maybe if I could pay attention, I wouldn't get into the 
trouble that I get into. 

For many years when I would come home and walk through the front door,
The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage would greet me with a kiss. And 
then she would say, “Good to see you.” 

I never thought too much about that; I just accepted it as the norm and
accept life as it comes; after all, I am too poor to pay attention. 

One time several weeks ago, when I came home, The Gracious Mistress of
the Parsonage greeted me with a kiss. Something seemed a little bit 
different. I just couldn't put my finger on it. 

Since my heart attack, I have been trying to stay on a restricted diet. 

My diet is not the same as my wife's. My diet is that I don't eat
anything I don't like. 

You can be sure that is not my wife's idea. Her idea of my diet is to
eat what she prescribes for me. 

One thing restricted on my diet, at least from her perspective, is an
Apple Fritter. I can never have too many of these, but my wife believes 
just thinking about an Apple Fritter is highly forbidden. 

My idea is, and I don't want her to know this, but as long as I don't
eat an Apple Fritter in the house, I'm obeying her restrictions. What I 
eat outside the house has nothing whatsoever to do with The Gracious 
Mistress of the Parsonage. 

It is tough for someone like me not to eat something that is so heavenly
delicious. I am quite confident that the angels in heaven enjoy an 
Apple Fritter on a regular basis. 

That being said, something strange began to unfold before me. 

After greeting me with a kiss, The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage
said something I didn't clearly hear. But, as I thought about it, it 
seemed like, “You didn't have an Apple Fritter today, did you?” 

I didn't pay attention to it because I didn't hear it exactly. That may
not have been what she said, so I wasn't going to push the issue and 
get myself into trouble. 

I have learned long ago not to push a subject I didn't have to. 

I smiled and went to my chair with a hot cup of coffee. Nothing settles
my mind better than a good strong Cup of Joe. 

To question The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage opens the door for a
lot of hardship. And who can afford that at this time of life? 

The next day as I came through the front door, she greeted me with a
kiss, and walking away I heard her very distinctly say, “That smells 
like a very delicious Apple Fritter.” 

I didn't know what to say or think at the time. Was she joking? Was I in

Thinking about it, I asked myself how she would know if I had an Apple
Fritter. Is she guessing or what? 

A few minutes after I got my coffee I sat down and began to think a
little bit. As you know, that always gets me into trouble. But in my 
thinking, I remembered I had an Apple Fritter before coming home. Now, 
how would she know that? 

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