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The Great Divide between Brain and Tongue (standard:humor, 905 words)
Author: GodspenmanAdded: Nov 13 2022Views/Reads: 194/88Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
I don’t know how much better that can be put. To refrain my tongue from evil is a great discipline in my daily life that offers great rewards throughout my life.

As my Uncle Fred used to say, one of the great benefits of getting old
is that you know everything. 

If you had ever met Uncle Fred, you would easily conclude that he
certainly wasn't getting old. 

Of course, there are things I have learned during my aging career that
has been of great use to me. If I weren't as old as I am, I wouldn't 
know all I know now. 

Of all the things I have learned throughout my aging career, the most
important one is that I have a great divide between my brain and my 
tongue. I would have thought that those two would be connected by this 
time in my life. I only wish Uncle Fred was alive so I could query him 
on the subject. 

It took me a long time to realize that there was this disconnect between
my brain and my tongue. It's been a slow process, and I'm not quite at 
the end of the tunnel yet, but I got my fingers crossed. 

When young, I didn't have much problem along this line. I was quick on
my tongue and thought I knew everything. The only thing I didn't know 
was what I didn't know. Oh, if only my brain were working today as I 
thought it was working when I was young. 

I'm not sure what happened, but somewhere along the line, my brain
retired, and I'm not quite sure where it is these days. But for some 
reason, my tongue has not yet retired. 

The main arena of my trouble has to do with The Gracious Mistress of the
Parsonage. Her brain and tongue are connected and work well together. 
Neither one has yet retired, according to her. 

Although she has given me many lessons along this line, I still have
that great divide that has cost me a lot of frustration. If only my 
tongue would not work until my brain kicks in, things might be much 

Quite often, when we're in some discussion, The Gracious Mistress of the
Parsonage will stop, look at me and say, “Is that your brain talking or 
just your tongue?” 

For the longest time, I had no idea what she was talking about. 

Contrary to good old Uncle Fred, my experience in growing older is that
my tongue works when my brain is in snooze mode. I'm not quite sure how 
this works, but I am in this dilemma for some reason. 

If only there was some way to get my brain and tongue connected and in
good unity, I think my life would be better. At least, that's the 
thinking of The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage, and her brain is 

If I could think three times more than I speak, I'm sure my life would
be much different, maybe even in line with my wife. 

The question I struggled with is, why does the brain slow down in life,
but the tongue speeds up? What is the connection there? And, is there a 
way to control the tongue? 

These are things I've been thinking about as I get older. If I believed
my good old Uncle Fred, I would have more control of my tongue than I 
do. But the older I get, the less control I have over my tongue. 

This is no more obvious than when The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage
and I discuss some subject. During the discussion, her brain is in 
complete control of her tongue. Or, so she says. 

My tongue, on the other hand, is completely out-of-control. When we have
some discussion, my tongue begins talking about something that is not 
even related to the subject. 

My wife then looks at me with a questionable stare and says, “What did
you just say? And what does that have to do with what we're talking 

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