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It’s My Birthday I’ll Lie If I Want To (standard:humor, 908 words)
Author: GodspenmanAdded: Jul 26 2020Views/Reads: 1053/730Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
As old as I am, I ought to know that nothing good comes from a lie. My birthday resolution this year is, "I shall lie not, no matter what.”
 



I'm not a proponent of lying. I don't like it when people lie. If they
lie once, how do you know they're not lying again? 

Lately, I've been thinking about what the definition of a lie really is.
Is there some time when telling a lie is the best to do? And, is every 
lie a non-truth? 

The reason I've been having these thoughts is that I just celebrated my
birthday. It always sneaks up on me, and I'm not sure why because it 
happens every year. 

It was like when I was in school, we always had a test on Friday, and it
always surprised me that the teacher had a test. 

So my birthday this year was somewhat of a surprise because I was so
busy doing other things I forgot about it. Having a birthday every year 
can be a little monotonous. 

One good thing about my birthday is that the Gracious Mistress of the
Parsonage's birthday is two days after mine. And so, if she remembers 
my birthday, then I will automatically remember hers. I love it when a 
plan comes together. 

Through the years, I wrestled with a certain problem. Do I really know
my birthday exactly? Do I know the exact day, the exact month, the 
exact year? 

The reason I say this is because my parents are the ones that fed me
this personal information. And to be honest, they have not always been 
truthful with me, I'm sorry to say. 

For instance, it took me a long time to realize that Santa Claus was not
real. All those years my parents told me that Santa Claus was real and 
that he was going to bring my presents if I was a good boy. I believed 
and trusted them. 

I still remember the day when I discovered that Santa Claus was not
real. When I accosted my parents with this new information, they simply 
explained it by saying, "Son, we were trying to make your life better 
and give you something to hope for." Then they would smile and asked me 
if I liked my Christmas present. 

So, if a lie produces good results, it's okay? 

Then there was the Easter Bunny. Every year we would celebrate the
Easter Bunny and collect the eggs scattered all through the yard. I was 
quite fascinated with the Easter Bunny to such an extent that I raised 
bunnies. 

Then the day came when I realized that the Easter Bunny did not exist. 

Again, I accosted my parents with this new information that I had, and
they explained it by saying, "Son, we just wanted you to have something 
fun to look forward to." 

So, a lie is okay if it ends up with somebody having fun! 

As I got older, my favorite was the Tooth Fairy. For every tooth that I
could pull, I would get $0.25 under my pillow that night. Whenever I 
had a loose tooth, I got very excited and began planning what to do 
with the $0.25. 

My parents were very excited when they saw how excited I was with a
loose tooth, and my father helped pull it out for me. Then, when I went 
to bed, I slipped it under my pillow with the eager anticipation that 
there would be $0.25 under my pillow in the morning. 

Every morning there was that $0.25, and I grabbed it, ran down to the
kitchen and showed my mother and father what the Tooth Fairy had 
brought me that night. 

One afternoon, I was looking for something in my parent's bedroom, and I
happen to come across a little box full of teeth. They seemed somewhat 
familiar; in fact, I realized they were my teeth. 



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