|Does God Expect Me to Pray For Broccoli (standard:humor, 908 words)|
|Author: Godspenman||Added: Nov 02 2013||Views/Reads: 1199/603||Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)|
|No prayer is worth praying if it is prayed outside of that righteous zone.|
For some inexplicable reason, the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage is under the impression that my favorite hobby is flying kites. I have no idea where she got that notion. Last Thursday, for example, she said to me in one of her sterner voices, “Why don't you just go and fly a kite?” The joke, of course, is on her. Ha! That is not my hobby and I have not flown a kite since I was nine years old when my mother made the same request. Who does she think I am? Benjamin Franklin? If she actually knew what my hobby was, I wonder if she would be so anxious for me to indulge. Some secrets are worth keeping. Two things guide me in my pursuit of life. I never fool around with fate and I never second-guess the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage. She suggested on Friday evening that we go out for supper. When younger I would have tried to figure out if she was up to something or if I was in some trouble, but not anymore. One of the great advantages of growing older is shedding the necessity of trying to figure everything out. Life has been much easier since I have started to live in the moment. So much in life is unexplainable that I have stopped wasting my time trying to explain it. Moreover, the greatest thing is, I am not under any pressure to understand everything or figure anything out, especially when it comes to the female side of the matrimonial equation. Let the mystery of romance do its thing. Just one thing, in spite of everything, still bothers me. I know it may be a minor matter to most people, but for me it is important. Do I have to pray for everything? On Friday, my wife and I made our way to our favorite restaurant and to our great delight, our favorite waitress was on duty and we requested her table. Stay with a sure thing, I always say. After our first cup of coffee, we were ready to contemplate our order. It is not good to order your meal right away; get settled in your seat, have a good cup of coffee and then decide on the meal for the evening. I chose the delicious meatloaf dinner while my “better half” ordered the pot roast. Both came with what our waitress called a vegetable medley. Let it be known that a “vegetable medley” was not harmonious with my primeval appetite. With an air of masculine sophistication, I ordered the vegetable of the day. It was too lovely of an evening to get hung up on such small matters. After all, I was unwinding and did not need to put my little gray cells in high gear. Taking our order, our waitress disappeared into the kitchen while we sat back to enjoy each other's society while our meal was being prepared. Luxury, in my book, is where you find it. After a busy week in the church, it is always beneficial to settle back and relax. Nothing is more important than getting balance in life and keeping it. Before we knew it, the waitress brought our meals and set them before us. Much to my surprise, the vegetable of the day was broccoli. The waitress quickly disappeared amidst some unsuccessful muffled giggling from across the table. Gaining some measure of composure, my wife requested I offer the prayer for the meal. My question: does God really expect me to pray for broccoli? I was reminded of an incident with my good friend and spiritual mentor, the Rev. Frank Simmons. After a Sunday morning service, a woman approached Frank with a simple request. “Oh, Brother Simmons,” she said in a dramatic fashion that always irritated Frank, “would you pray that my daughter gets married?” Without giving her request any thought, he replied in the negative. The thing I always liked about good ole Brother Simmons was that he was Click here to read the rest of this story (32 more lines)
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