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And Then It Was Summer (standard:humor, 903 words)
Author: GodspenmanAdded: Jun 29 2015Views/Reads: 778/0Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
It is easy to get all caught up with the activities of the world around, but it takes a lot of discipline to really “rest in the Lord.”
 



Summer is my favorite time of the year. It makes up for the nastiness of
winter, the cold and the gloom, not to mention the snow. The only place 
I like my snow is on a postcard sent by some family member up North 
where they have all the kind of stuff. 

My love affair with summer began when I was in school. I know school is
supposed to be a great time and it was for me except for those classes 
where the teachers were trying to teach me something. They had their 
work cut out with me. 

School was rather boring, but then, Summer came and set all the
prisoners free, me being one of them. Since that time, I have always 
appreciated the good nature of Summer and have celebrated it as 
enthusiastically as possible. 

Now that summer is here, the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage and me
are planning to take a wee bit of vacation. It is not often that we can 
pack up our bags and “get out of Dodge.” When we do, it is a very 
special time. 

When it comes to vacations, my wife and I are at opposite ends of what a
vacation is all about. As soon as we mention the word “vacation,” I am 
ready to go. Not so with the better half. She has all kinds of planning 
and preparation work to do and it takes more work for her to plan our 
vacation than it does to stay home and just work. 

My part of the planning is to stay out of her way! I learned this a long
time ago and have the scars to prove it. 

Some people believe that women are masters at multitasking. My wife is
the queen. I, on the other hand, am a master at anti-tasking. My wife 
can juggle four or five different jobs at the same time while I can do 
nothing at the same time. It's a gift on my part. 

For vacation, I only need three things, which makes my vacation the
wonder and joy that it always is. 

The first thing I pack for vacation is my incorrigible laziness. I am
not boasting, mind you, but I have mastered the art of laziness like 
nobody you know. In fact, if I was not so lazy, I would do several 
workshops on Mastering the Art of Laziness. I have a Master's degree in 
laziness and if I was not so lazy, I would prepare a diploma to hang on 
the wall. 

Some people go on vacation to do all kinds of things and get involved in
all kinds of activities; I go to work on my laziness. 

My wife has a little bit of trouble with this. She is the Queen Bee when
it comes to busyness and is buzzing all the time. I am the honey that 
flows rather slowly. 

Another important thing in my baggage for vacation is my non-vegetable
diet. I know vegetables are good for you, but please, on my vacation 
this is the one thing I am vacating. 

When I sit down at a meal on my vacation, I do not want to see any
vegetables or anything green or leafy on my plate. I want my plate 
piled high with apple pie à la mode, chocolate cake topped with a scoop 
of ice cream, and for dessert, a bowl of ice cream topped with a scoop 
of ice cream, and do not be stingy with the chocolate fudge. 

Of course, after such a lunch I am feeling a little woozy and need to go
back to my room and sleep it off. This is carefully planned on my part. 
After every lunch, my vacation companion has this uncontrollable desire 
to visit thrift shops. She can smell a thrift shop 25 miles away. You 
can imagine how someone as lazy as me is not too interested in visiting 
all of these stores during vacation. It has something to do with my 
drug problem. I do not like being drug from one thrift shop to another 
all afternoon. 

Then there is my Sun Sponge attitude that soaks up all the sun
available. When I come back from my vacation, I want to have a sunny 
glow about me that lasts for weeks. 

This is where the art of laziness is quite handy. In order to get as
much sun as possible you have to be able to do as little as possible. 
Sitting out in the sun with nothing to do is the best posture for 
soaking up the sun. 

So, here I am, sitting all packed and ready to go, while the wife is
making sure she has everything packed she needs. I could go on vacation 
on a scooter while she needs a U-Haul. 

No matter who you are, vacation is a time for rest and I suppose
everybody has their own definition of rest. 

The Bible speaks of “rest” around 380 times. Most people have not caught
this idea. 

My favorite verse is, “Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for him:
fret not thyself because of him who prospereth in his way, because of 
the man who bringeth wicked devices to pass” (Psalms 37:7). 

It is easy to get all caught up with the activities of the world around,
but it takes a lot of discipline to really “rest in the Lord.” 


   


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