Click here for nice stories main menu

main menu   |   standard categories   |   authors   |   new stories   |   search   |   links   |   settings   |   author tools

If Everything Is Coming up Roses, What About All the Thorns? (standard:humor, 904 words)
Author: GodspenmanAdded: Sep 13 2015Views/Reads: 975/619Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
Just like a rose bush, life has its share of thorns. Between those thorns are roses, which make the thorns worthwhile.

When it comes to flowers, a flower is simply a flower. I do not know the
difference between a rose and a lily. If it looks pretty, I like it. I 
like to keep things simple. 

When I have to buy flowers for the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage, I
have a wee bit of difficulty. Thankfully, the florist where I purchase 
flowers seems to know quite a bit about flowers. All I need to do is 
say, “I'd like to order flowers for my wife.” 

Usually they will begin the conversation by saying, “What kind of
flowers would you like?” 

To which I will respond, “Flowers for my wife.” 

I explain to them my flower deficiency and the flowers are not for me,
so I do not care, they are for my wife. They nod their head, smile 
knowingly, and make a selection for me. 

By the time we had been married for eight years, she commented on the
flowers, which I did not quite get at the time. She simply said, “These 
flowers are as lovely as the same ones you bought last year for me.” 

At the time, I smiled and thought I had hit it out of the ballpark. 

As a young husband, I did not quite know how to interpret many of the
comments coming from my wife. I soon began to understand wives speak a 
different language than husbands. To this day, I am not quite sure what 
she is saying to me, but I smile broadly, nod my head vigorously and 
hope I'm somewhere in the ballpark. 

Then came the time she wanted to plant roses in our backyard. I was all
for it. When she brought the subject up, I smiled broadly and nodded my 
head vigorously not really knowing what was before us. Actually, not 
knowing what was before me. 

First, we went to a garden store, of which I have never been to before,
to select the roses for our backyard. I am always excited about any new 
experiences, especially if it involves both my wife and me. It is nice 
to do things together. 

As we entered the store, my wife knew exactly where to go and led the
way to the flower center. It was such a new experience to me I walked 
behind her with my mouth open staring to my left and then to my right. 
I never knew so many different flowers existed. 

My wife, on the other hand, seemed to know exactly where she was going. 

Then, we finally arrived at our destination. The Rose Center. 

I must confess I was rather confused. It was the Rose Center but there
were no roses to be found. All I could see were a bunch of pots with 
sticks sticking out of them with thorns. I was to become personally 
acquainted with those thorns later. 

“Where,” I asked, “are the roses?” 

“Right in front of you!” I ignored her sarcastic tone and looked at what
she thought were roses. Under the circumstances, I decided to let it 
go. I figure there is no sense to embarrass her in front of the public. 
If she sees roses, who am I to contradict her? 

Then I had a panic moment. One of the customer service personnel was
walking in our direction. My “husband-mode” kicked in and I wanted to 
rescue my wife from an embarrassing moment. 

I stepped up, shook the customer service personnel's hand and said, “I
think we're a little lost here. We're looking for roses.” 

“Well,” he said with a big smile, “you're in the right place. These are
the best roses you will find anywhere.” 

To which, I was discombobulated. I looked all around and could not see
one rose. I really do not like to be snookered like this. When I want 
to buy a rose, I want to buy a rose. 

Click here to read the rest of this story (30 more lines)

Authors appreciate feedback!
Please write to the authors to tell them what you liked or didn't like about the story!
Godspenman has 528 active stories on this site.
Profile for Godspenman, incl. all stories

stories in "humor"   |   all stories by "Godspenman"  

Nice Stories @, support email: nice at nicestories dot com
Powered by StoryEngine v1.00 © 2000-2020 - Artware Internet Consultancy