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Pursuing A Course In Apple-Fritterology (standard:humor, 915 words)
Author: GodspenmanAdded: Sep 25 2016Views/Reads: 593/348Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
One of the joys of life when somebody is frustrating you is to return the favor.

Recently, and by that I mean within the last month, my cell phone has
been ringing out of my shirt pocket. It is rather frustrating because I 
rarely give my number to anybody. But there it goes, ringing and 
ringing and ringing. 

Usually the calls are for political polls of which I am not the least
bit interested. If they want to know whom I am voting for they are 
going to have to come up with a little bit of coin for me. Why should I 
give them information they are going to sell to someone else? We all 
know politics goes to the highest bidder. 

The only difference between a pollster and a polecat is... I'm not sure
there is any. 

Then, there are those called Robo calls. I still do not understand what
in the world they are. The phone rings and there is nobody on the other 
end. I can say “Hello” 100 times and still nobody answers. If I ever 
find out who this Robo is, I will be tempted to give them a piece of my 

Does everybody have my cell phone number? Most of the time I cannot
remember what my number is and I have to look at my phone. 

Then I started getting phone calls the other week concerning furthering
my education. 

“I understand,” they always begin which makes me a little suspicious,
“that you are interested in furthering your education.” 

Well, I try to learn something every day if that is what they mean. But
it's not what they mean. 

“From your recent application on the website,” they say is if they know
exactly what they are talking about, “you have indicated that you are 
interested in our university.” Then they pause to catch their breath I 
guess, “What are you interested in pursuing?” 

The first dozen calls I explained to them that there must be a mistake,
I was not on their website and I am not interested in anything that 
they are providing. 

From a practical standpoint, you would think that would settle it. But
oh no. These people have a script and they stick to their script. 

“So what is the interest of your further education?” 

It must be the Pennsylvania Dutch in me or something because I can only
take this kind of thing for so long. Then, the real me oozes out of my 
system. Suddenly I had an idea. 

It takes a lot for me to get an idea and these calls were pushing me to
my limit. And so I came up with a brilliant idea. At least I thought it 
was brilliant. 

The next one that called I said, “Yes, I am interested in furthering my

“Wonderful,” they said reading from their script, “what area of study
are you interested in?” 

Now I had them eating out of my hand, and I have not washed my hands all

“I would like to pursue a course,” I said as seriously as I possibly
could manage, “in Apple-fritterology.” Of course, I had never heard of 
such a thing, but who knows what's out there? 

There was a slight pause on the other end of the phone and finally the
person said, “What did you say?” 

“I would like to pursue a course in Apple-fritterology.” 

“Would you mind,” the other end of the phone muttered, “spelling that
for me?” 

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