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Not Everything in Life Is Automatic (standard:humor, 901 words)
Author: GodspenmanAdded: Nov 11 2018Views/Reads: 328/163Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
Not everything is automatic, some things you have to work for.

Two days in the year I don't like. Somebody is thinking it is my wife's
birthday and our wedding anniversary. 

I worked that out a long time ago. My birthday is two days before the
Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage and our anniversary is three weeks 
after our birthday. No way can I forget that. 

When my wife gives me a birthday card with some gift it reminds me that
I have two days to reciprocate. And reciprocate, I do very well. I love 
it when a plan comes together. 

I remember my wife's birthday and I remember our wedding anniversary,
but more often than not, I cannot remember the years. I do not know how 
old my wife is. At least, that's my story. And, I am not sure how long 
we've been married. 

I know we have been married long enough to work out many things. 

The two days I'm not very happy with are the days when we turn the clock
forward an hour and then turn the clock backward an hour. I still do 
not know why in the world we do that. We gain an hour in the spring, 
but then we lose an hour in the fall. What's the sense in all that? 

I finally figured out what the sense of all that is. It is to confuse
me, in particular. It is not that I am easily confused, but rather, I 
confuse easily. If that makes sense, I have a bridge I want to sell 

Why would you want to gain something and then give it back a couple
months later? 

I grew up in the non-technical age. I had to wind my watch every day to
make sure it had the right time. It was not like it is today worth the 
time is set automatically. 

I look at my cell phone and the time is updated automatically. I look at
our TV set and see that the time is updated automatically. I like that. 

My problem is that I like it too much. I have become accustomed to
things being adjusted automatically. 

Now they have cars that part automatically and you can be sure I'm not
going to buy one. I am satisfied with the automatic setting of my clock 
and TV. 

When I was in high school, I worked part-time for a woman. I mowed the
grass and cleaned inside the house. One big thing she had in the house 
was about 25 clocks. I'm serious. Twenty-five clocks that all had to be 
set manually. 

The first time I did it, I did not realize that each clock was set
differently. You go upstairs and the clocks were 15 minutes faster than 
the clocks on the first floor so she would not be late for an 

Being my employer, it would have been nice for her to explain that to
me. But, as most employers do, they do not explain everything to their 

I was the kind of employee that liked to impress my employer with how
good I was. 

It was in the fall and we were to set the clocks back one hour. I
thought she would appreciate the fact that I went around and reset all 
25 of her clocks. After all, I was doing something on my own that 
needed done. 

The thing I did not know of course, the clocks were all set different on
different levels of the house. I went around and set all 25 clocks to 
the same time. I was so happy. 

I did not tell her because I wanted her to be surprised. 

I was anxious to hear her commend me for a “job well done.” I was not

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