Click here for nice stories main menu

main menu   |   standard categories   |   authors   |   new stories   |   search   |   links   |   settings   |   author tools

Have Mouth, Will Stutter (standard:humor, 914 words)
Author: GodspenmanAdded: Feb 09 2019Views/Reads: 150/54Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
I am not sure Solomon ever stuttered in his life, but I have discovered that as difficult as my stuttering syndrome is, it at least has won one great victory.

I pride myself with the ability to express myself with the proper
wording. I enjoy words and seeing how they relate one to another. 
Unfortunately, it has not always been the case. 

I have found through the years that I have developed quite the art of
stuttering. It happens at the most inconvenient moments. 

It is like the story of Honest Abe Lincoln and his wife. The story is
not true of course, but it is very interesting. Mrs. Lincoln asks 
Honest Abe, “Does this dress make me look fat?” 

Known as “Honest Abe” we all chuckle at that moment of stuttering for

I have had such moments of my own. 

For example, the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage and I might be
sitting in the living room watching TV and all the time the person on 
the other couch is chattering. Me, I am not listening, just smiling and 
nodding my head in agreement. That has cost me quite a bit throughout 
the years. 

The wife was chattering and then she stopped and said, “I want to know
what you think about that? And please be honest with me.” 

Now the stuttering syndrome begins. I had no idea what she was talking
about. Now I am backed into the proverbial corner with nowhere to go. 
How I answer that question, may determine my health. 

“Well,” my dear, I stuttered, “if you think it's a good idea I just want
you to know that I support you 100%.” Getting that out gives me a great 
sigh of relief. While saying this I am looking at her smiling very 

“Oh,” my wife says rather sarcastically, which should have been a
warning to me, “you want broccoli for supper tonight. Right?” 

How you get out of a situation like that is something I have yet to
learn. Sometimes, or maybe I should say, all the time, it is crucial to 
listen to what your wife is saying particularly the questions. 

One morning after finishing breakfast, she looked at me smilingly and
said, “Ya wanna take a ride with me this morning?” 

The first time she asked me this question I was startled because I could
not remember the previous conversation as to where she wanted to go 
that morning. Trying to be the gracious husband that I sometimes think 
I am, which is a solo opinion, I smiled, nodded and said, “Yes, of 
course, I want to go with you this morning.” 

That morning we went from thrift shop to thrift shop to thrift shop. I
had no idea there were that many thrift shops in the entire world. 

I must say that my stuttering has got me into quite a bit of trouble
throughout the years. I do not think I have improved with the years. 

As they say, “One man's stutter is his wife's approval.” 

Of course, not all my stuttering has been negative. There were times
that my stuttering put me in the right direction and I have been so 

While in Bible Institute, I was dating this young woman. At the time,
she was part of a singing group and I traveled along just to travel 
along. We were going in a van and coming home, we sat in the back of 
the van. 

I must confess I was not a dating master at the time. I am not sure I
have improved throughout the years, but at this point, I do not have to 
do any dating. At the time, I was vulnerable to the situation at hand. 

In the back of the van, we sat and chatted about this and that. I talked
about this and she talked about that. The conversation seemed to go 
along quite well. As someone who was not experienced in the dating 
world, I was having a wonderful time. 

Click here to read the rest of this story (34 more lines)

Authors appreciate feedback!
Please vote, and write to the authors to tell them what you liked or didn't like about the story!
Godspenman has 481 active stories on this site.
Profile for Godspenman, incl. all stories
Due to abuse, voting is disabled.
For a quick, anonymous response to the author of this story, type
a message below. It will be sent to the author by email.

stories in "humor"   |   all stories by "Godspenman"  

Nice Stories @, support email: nice at nicestories dot com
Powered by StoryEngine v1.00 © 2000-2014 - Artware Internet Consultancy BV