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Some Things Seem Too Good To Be True (standard:humor, 895 words)
Author: GodspenmanAdded: Mar 21 2020Views/Reads: 153/0Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
Recently I discovered something. The more I try to keep up with the latest trend, the further behind I get. I am not a complete technical idiot, but I'm not too far off. The only

Recently I discovered something. The more I try to keep up with the
latest trend, the further behind I get. I am not a complete technical 
idiot, but I'm not too far off. The only thing I can say about me is 
that I at least try. 

The best example of all of this has to do with my cell phone. Is there
anybody on the planet today that does not have a cell phone? And, the 
most important question, is there anybody driving a car that is not at 
the same time on that cell phone? Who in the world are they all talking 

My guess is they are all talking to each other. At least, they are not
talking to me. 

The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage finally convinced me to go into
cahoots with her and get cell phones. The plan was this. She got to 
pick out the cell phones, and I got to pay the bill. I must say I beat 
her on this one. 

She only got to take the cell phone once but I, get to pay the bill
every month. I was chuckling to myself that I finally pulled one over 
on her until I realized that I get to pay the bill every month. Every 
month! This is the last time I will try to pull something over on her. 
I never win. 

Consequently, we are now in the cell phone industry. I am not sure it is
all working out for the good. 

I have yet to master the technical skill associated with successfully
using my cell phone. Although my cell phone is rather small, it has 
more buttons on it than Bozo the clown's costume. Not only are there 
more buttons than I can count, but each button is smaller than I can 
see. Who in the world designed such small buttons? 

I really think that my cell phone was designed for some midget. 

At this point, I cannot tell the difference when my cell phone is
ringing or when I am receiving a text message. When a text message 
comes in, I try to answer the cell phone, and nobody seems to be on the 
other end. When I try to read the text message, there are only letters 
instead of words. It takes me a half-hour to figure out one text 
message. Where is Sherlock Holmes when you need him? 

I may not be the brightest letter on the keyboard, but I do know how to
spell words. It seems that to use a cell phone today, you have to throw 
out words and start using letters. I will never get the hang of that. 

When somebody is on the phone, and I am talking, all of a sudden, the
phone goes dead. I can talk for 3 minutes before realizing nobody is on 
the other end. I find this most frustrating. 

I am not sure that the convenience of the cell phone is worth the
frustrating elements associated with having the cell phone. 

In a crowded restaurant the other day, my cell phone went off. Not
thinking too much of my environment, I answered the cell phone. It was 
a friend calling me. 

The conversation started rather jovial for all practical purposes.
Suddenly I became conscious I had an audience. There are times when I 
prefer not to have an audience. This was one of those times. 

I realized some of the people around me were eavesdropping in on my
conversation. Then the unthinkable happened. My cell phone suddenly 
went dead. It went dead in the middle of a rather humorous joke I was 
telling. Now, what was I to do? 

It really was not my fault that the phone went dead. I did not plan it
that way. Besides, I hate it when somebody stops in the middle of a 
joke, and you never get to the punchline. 

For a few seconds, I was not sure what the proper protocol is when your
phone goes dead, and you have an audience. I had to do some swift 
thinking and come up with what I thought was a brilliant plan. 

I understand that when you do have an audience, you have a certain
responsibility with that audience. So, not to disappoint my audience, I 
continued my conversation on the cell phone as though somebody was 
actually on the other end. I was able to finish my joke, and then I 
paused, not knowing what else to do. I merely continued the 
conversation I was having with my friend, who was not on the other end 
of this time. 

Sometimes it is good just to keep up a good front. From the snickers of
the people around me in that restaurant, it was well worth finishing 
that joke. I hate to waste a good joke. After all, they are so hard to 
come by these days. 

Many things are just too good to be true, and many of them I probably
will never really get the hang of it. One thing I never really will 
fully understand is God's love for me. 

"For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that
whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting 
life" (John 3:16). 

Although this sounds too good to be true, it is true nevertheless.


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