It’s All Over But The Lying (standard:humor, 896 words)
Author: Godspenman	Added: Nov 29 2020	Views/Reads: 983/661	Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
No good comes from lying. My great challenge is to acknowledge that I’m lying and then do something to correct that.

The one thing I don't like is when somebody deliberately lies to me.
Trust me; this has happened quite a few times in my life. 

Sometimes, by accident, they say something that isn't true; they just
got their facts mixed up. 

Other times, it's a ploy to deceive me and get something from me. 

As I often say, if you can't con me you can't con anyone. 

I must say I have become very suspicious when somebody I don't know
promises me something “free.” If you follow through with these “free” 
things, it's like my aunt used to say, “Sonny, there ain't nuthin 
free.” 

I'm sure my aunt would not lie to me. 

Don't let this get around, but my opinion is every time a politician
opens his mouth, he's lying. But you didn't hear it from me. 

I've had to learn how NOT to lie. It's been challenging, but I have been
persistent in this goal of mine. There have been stumbling, but I have 
gotten up every time and started over again. I don't lie as much as I 
used to. 

Not that I intentionally lie, at least I don't think so. I sometimes get
the facts wrong. 

Like when I'm talking to the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage. I
remember once she interrupted me and said, “You're not lying, are you?” 


I was stunned. If there's somebody I'm not going to lie to, it is my
wife because she will discover the lie somewhere down the line. When 
she discovers the lie, there are consequences, as you well know. 

I try not to lie; that's why I try not to talk too much. When I'm
talking, I'm mixing up facts from different situations, which ends in 
confusion. I'm not lying; I'm just confused. 

The only exception is for fishermen. My uncle, for example, was a great
fisherman, or so he told us. If he caught all the fish he said he 
caught, there would be no fish left in the world. Because he was my 
uncle, I went along with his stories. 

Besides that, I don't think there's any reason to lie. 

Then there are those situations when you're trying to do something
behind your wife's back, and you don't want her to know about it 
because it's a surprise. Have you ever tried surprising your wife? 

Around Christmas time is the worst time in the world for this kind of
thing. It's not that I'm lying to her; I just want to surprise her with 
a Christmas gift. I'm trying to hide something from her. 

Coming home the other day, I walked into the living room, and the
Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage said, "Where have you been?" 

That is the question. It's not where have I been, but where in the world
am I going? If I tell her where I was, she would get the hint because 
it's Christmas time and I'm getting her a present. Is it wrong to 
conceal something like this? Do you think Santa would forgive me? 

I have a hard time hiding anything from my wife. She knows what I'm
doing three weeks before I do it. 

Last year, she asked me where I was, and I fumbled around, trying to
cover my tracks. I don't think I was that good at doing it. When we 
were opening our Christmas presents on Christmas day, she opened hers 
and said, "Oh, that's where you were when I ask you where you were." 
Then she laughed. I was relieved. 

This year I'm wrestling with a certain situation. I've had some physical
problems, nothing serious. But my wife is the kind of person who sees 
something and is obsessed with trying to fix it. That's a really good 


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