|Behind the Eight Ball (standard:other, 474 words)|
|Author: Michael Gates||Added: Mar 11 2003||Views/Reads: 3515/1353||Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)|
|A dialogue with an Eight Ball proves revealing.|
--Give it here. I'll shake it good! --No, just turn it over--that'll work. --Ah, but will it work? Or will it spout a lot of cryptic nonsense? --You could ask it that! --Ha! Hello? Hello? Is anybody home? --It says, "YES." --Hey, Mr. Eight Ball, will I ever win the lottery? --How do you know it's not MS. Eight Ball? Hmm, "BETTER NOT TELL YOU NOW." --What good is he? --It's bored with money questions, I think. That's what everyone asks about. --That's what everyone wants to know. What else is there to ask about? --Love? --Uhhh . . . . --Never mind. How about what Peggy Lee sings about in that old song: "Is that all there is?" --All there is to life, you mean. Mr. Eight Ball, is there life after death? --Don't shake so hard! Give it here . . . . "IT IS DECIDEDLY SO." --All right! Something to look forward to. Here's another question: Will my luck hold out? --It says, "CONCENTRATE AND ASK AGAIN." --Pfffft. Eight Ball, will Fortuna keep smiling on me? --"MY SOURCES SAY NO." --Sources? I've got my own sources. All I have to do is score one more kilo. --Spare me the details. --My ship is docking. I can feel it . . . . --You'll just assume whatever you want, then, no matter what it says? --Yeah. What's the sense in asking an Eight Ball to solve the mysteries of life? --At least it's revealed what's on your mind. --Whatever. Let's ask how he knows so much, anyway--or thinks he does. --Uh, I'm afraid you'll have to phrase that as a yes or no question. --Oh, right. Well . . . . Eight Ball, do you have a direct link to the man upstairs? Are you tuned in to the Cosmic Muffin? Are you God's mouthpiece? --That's three questions. --No, it's one question. --Let's see . . . . "YOU MAY RELY ON IT"! --Saying it doesn't make it so, of course. He could be taking dictation from some demon. Click here to read the rest of this story (33 more lines)
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