|Don't Drink The Water (standard:humor, 4772 words)|
|Author: radiodenver||Added: Aug 20 2004||Views/Reads: 2329/1510||Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)|
|All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.|
Don't Drink the Water Having survived a number of life's shipwrecks with little more than my dignity and my job, I've concluded that my destiny is to suffer in silence, an endless stream of private torments whilst those around me enjoy their lavish and extravagant lives. Each day borne of new hopes, ends with the feeling that I am afflicted with bad luck and that; perhaps, tomorrow may bring some miniscule improvement to the disposition of my life. The dust of my life slowly settles in my head as I sit gazing through the office window at the long leafy shadows that dance across the brick wall. My phone is ringing. The number on the display is the boss, Sam. Sam is a decent fellow. He started with the company a few years before me and he knows the ropes well enough. We've worked out an informal agreement, I keep him up to date with what's going on in my department and he won't bother me with mundane matters unless the higher ups are pestering him. Today, the higher ups are buzzing about something. “Lang?” “What?” I think I may have been a little short with Sam. I hate being disturbed in the middle of my work. “Do you have that project outline for me yet?” Oh yes; the project, my outline for corporate success. I don't have a clue what senior management is expecting, but a wordy document with lots of calculations, figures and graphs of corporate productivity will make any middle manager slobber in anticipation. With the aid of my newly purchased computer, I'm well prepared. “Yes sir. Well, almost. I'll have it to you before I leave today.” My outline for corporate success was actually complete days ago. I didn't want to submit it until the last minute on the day I left for vacation; it's a technique I have learned throughout the years and if used properly, helps keep the questions and work load to a minimum. Besides this most recent “project outline” is nothing more than a rework of the last “project outline.” We seem to go through this exercise every four to five years. I think it's because of new management and turnover. Only we crusty veterans who have been around for an eternity know about these cycles. Those fresh out of college or hired from outside the company must experience project outlines for the first time. They are generally oblivious to the foresight of the elder statesmen amongst them. “I wonder if I should take my golf clubs with me to Mexico.” I whisper. “What's that?” “Oh, nothing. I was just thinking about something else.” “Great Lang. I'll review it and we'll talk about it when you get back from vacation. You need a vacation man; you're getting a little edgy.” “Yea, I know. Sorry.” Otis the Superintendent saunters into my office daily. He's a good fellow but a little preoccupied with leaky faucets and curling floor tiles. I'm his supervisor but I don't spend much time supervising unless there's a conflict with vacation requests or somebody has sliced their finger off, in which case I have to do paperwork and order replacement gauze. “Hey Lang, how about a cup of coffee?” Otis is the only person in the office that drinks as much coffee as I do. Any time he sees an empty Styrofoam cup sitting atop my desk, he jumps at the opportunity to fetch another for me. “My fourth of the day. Okay, sure.” Maybe I shouldn't drink so much coffee, but I need it so badly. If I were to stop my massive Click here to read the rest of this story (524 more lines)
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