|why women bosses cry (standard:humor, 1297 words)|
|Author: CAROL NATUKUNDA||Added: Jun 09 2005||Views/Reads: 2514/1270||Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)|
|women easily cry when they r angry,while a man would only be mad-without crying. why????|
Why women bosses cry By Carol Natukunda HOW would you react to a crying woman boss? “I would take off. For how do I face her in such a state? Everyone might think I am insensitive to my boss' feelings,” says Timothy, a 40-year-old communications consultant. Subordinates are mortified when a female boss cries in their presence. To them, she should be firm, authoritative, intelligent and in control at all times. Suddenly, she has rested her head on her office desk. Something is troubling her. Nothing seems to help her overcome the anger but cry. Lots of women bosses have confessed to breaking down in tears at the work place. It may be job-related, domestic-related or any other issue that triggers off an emotional outburst. A local female human resource consultant, who prefers anonymity, recounts of an incident that made her cry in office: “It was in 1994 after I heard my diagnosis. I could not believe that the results had shown early signs of blood pressure. I couldn't stop crying. I cried on the way back to office and cried more when I got there. It was a Monday morning. Originally, I had planned to continue with my work from the clinic. But back at the office, I just kept on crying. I sobbed more when my colleague came to greet me. She must have been at a loss for words,” she narrates. Maggie Kigozi, the Executive Director of Uganda Investment Authority (UIA), says she cried in office because she was upset. “I had just started working with UIA,” she reveals, “I was so upset about some business negotiations we were handling, so I cried.” A 35-year-old female lecturer at Makerere University says she cried after a group of backbenchers ignored her plea to them to stop chatting in the lecture room. “I went into a series of reactions— numbness, disbelief, and anger at my students for not taking me seriously,” she says adding, “and then, before I could realise it, I was sobbing.” She says she could not go on teaching because the class booed her. “Why can't I say out my dilemma without crying?” she asks. She says she cries about any issue that deeply troubles her. “I should have been a little bit bolder in front of my class,” she says. Michelle Betz, an international press associate at Butare, University in Rwanda says: “Sometimes I have what I call a mini-breakdown at work.” “I may try hard not to cry, but all the same I save it for home.” A male marketing manager admits that he feels uncomfortable questioning women because they may begin crying. “I asked my deputy if she had followed up on something and why it didn't go right, and then she cried,” he says. Lots of women cry when they are disappointed. They cry when they get sad news, demanding jobs and fail to get promoted after working so hard. They also cry when they are ignored, undermined, taken advantage of or even misunderstood. Natural as it may seem for a woman to cry for a reason, with it comes a terrible distress about not wanting to cry. This seems to be as bad as the issue she is crying about. Is it a weakness? Crying may be a usual phenomenon, but the tears of a woman at work may be complex and difficult to comprehend. Why would a woman boss make a public display of such emotions having gone this far in her career? Can intense frustration and disappointment become too painful to make her break down into tears? How is it that a man and a woman can face an equally difficult situation, but only the woman ends up crying? Is it a woman's weakness? “Must be,” says Nicholas Muhumuza, a medical doctor. “I don't think a man would cry in case of anything. We usually shout at or punch someone to release the anger in the way, but without a sign of tears.” Julius Borore, a magistrate in Mbale, says women may not have the strength to control their emotions. “They do not measure up to men who can face the challenges without bursting into tears,” he says. Edith Mukisa, the programme director of Naguru Teenage and Information Health Centre, says it not a weakness. She says naturally, an already stressed working woman, who is also a mother, would cry if hurt. “It's not easy to work as a mother and a boss. So incase of any vulnerability at the job, they would not hold back their tears. I don't think it's a flaw,” Mukisa says. Susan Muhwezi, a special presidential assistant on AGOA and Trade, says women by nature are compassionate. “It's not that we are too weak to handle pressure. Rather, I think we take whatever we do and face seriously. Where a man would punch someone out of anger, a lady may express her frustration by crying,” she says. Judith Owembabazi, the senior marketing and public relations officer of Housing Finance Company of Uganda Limited, also says a crying boss only expresses her sadness and fear in a way that a man would have handled with anger and stubbornness. “Crying is human nature and not a woman's weak spot,” she says. Some feel that tears are worth the pain they face. Diana Ndaba, a graduate, says the empathy of a woman must be seen by her teary eyes, because eyes are the door to her heart. “Crying Click here to read the rest of this story (33 more lines)
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