|AT THE DOC'S (standard:humor, 423 words)|
|Author: Danny Zil||Added: Apr 14 2006||Views/Reads: 1916/0||Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)|
|The Doc wants to run some tests....but this dude ain't got the time for that kinda gig.|
“If you carry on drinking like this,” the Doc said to me, “you'll never see the year out.” I glanced at my watch. It was mid-day on the thirty first of December. Hey, we were cuttin things kinda fine here. The Doc studied some medical lookin reports. He tapped his fingers on his desk. Then he tapped his feet on the floor. Then he tapped a cigarette from me an lit it. He peered at me over his full-moon glasses. “We've had the results of your tests back,” he said eventually, indicating the reports, “and they don't look good.” “How come ?” I asked. “You failed in English, Maths and Science,” he replied and giggled. I threw my head back an laughed but it sounded hollow. Like the soft-nosed slug I heard clicked into a chamber. I glanced back sharply an the Doc had a Magnum pointin at me. “Hearing seems fine,” he said and laid the revolver down. The Nurse came into the room. She had one of those bodies a man would kill for – flat stomach, great biceps, dark moustache. “There are some people in the Waiting Room, Doctor,” she informed him. “No problem,” he replied, “I've rented it out to them for a couple of months.” The Nurse looked over at me an smiled but I realised there was somethin phoney about it. “It's my gums,” she explained, “they're false.” “You can put your clothes back on now,” the Doc told me. It was then I understood how bad his eyesight was – I hadn't taken them off in the first place. An Ambulance siren started wailin a coupla streets away, grew louder as it reached the buildin then gradually began to grow fainter again as it headed off into the distance. “Try to ignore it,” advised the Nurse. “It's only Pierre – he does those damn siren impressions all day long just to irritate us.” The Doc leafed through some medical forms an handed one to her. “We'll have to run more tests,” he told me. “The Nurse will explain what we require.” She glanced at the form then strolled over to a cupboard an came back with a few of those little medical containers. “We'll need some samples from you,” she said. “If you follow me, I'll show you into a cubicle.” “What kinda samples?” I asked. “Well we need a urine sample, a stool sample and a semen sample,” she answered. “Hell Nurse,” I drawled, “I'm in kind of a hurry. Mind if I just leave my shorts ?” Tweet
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