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country boy eats large watermelon (standard:humor, 518 words)
Author: stanley mcqueen kentucky backwoods writerAdded: Apr 15 2007Views/Reads: 2448/0Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
short country humor

THE MAN FROM MUDDYFORK ~ VI Stanley Ray Mcqueen, Kentucky 

the big new car pulled up in front of the Muddy Fork store ......
driving it is a city slicker ...... the city man notices that sitting 
on a bench beside the store is a large country fellow who is wearing a 
old ragged pair of overalls and in his jaw is a large cud of chewing 
tobacco ...... he is wearing no shoes and tobacco juice is running down 
his chin ...... just to make a long story short he seemed to be just a 
little touched in the head ...... laying beside him is a red skinny 
hound asleep in the warm sunshine ...... the city fellow can't help but 
strike up a conversation ...... howdy there fellow, the city fellow 
greets him with a smile ...... nice day out here in the country he adds 
...... yes it is replied the country lad ...... the city fellow can't 
help but notice a huge watermelon sitting near where the country fellow 
is sitting, with a for sale sign on it ...... the city fellow thinks he 
will have a little fun with the country fellow ...... hey boy says the 
city fellow, do you think you could eat that big melon all by yourself 
asked the city fellow ...... the country fellow looks closely at the 
huge watermelon and says I suppose I could maybe ...... well if you can 
eat every bite of it I'll tell you what I will buy the melon and also 
pay you five full dollars if you can eat every bite of that large melon 
...... well I will take you up on that said the country fellow but 
first I need to go up the hollow for a little while before I try and 
eat that melon ...... that will be fine but hurry back said the city 
fellow ...... so off up the hollow the slow-moving country fellow goes 
and it wasn't long before he is back and eager to light in on that huge 
melon ...... he busted that big melon and ate the flesh right down to 
the hull ...... the city fellow stands in amazement and wonder, and 
then reaches the country fellow a new five-dollar bill ...... let me 
ask you one question said the city fellow ...... why did you have to 
leave for a while before you would tackle eating that big watermelon 
...... well that's easy to answer says the country fellow ...... my 
pappy grows melons and he had one twice bigger than the one I just eat 
...... and I knowed for sure that if I could eat pappy's big melon then 
I wouldn't have nary bit of trouble eating that one I just eat ...... 
the city fellow busted out laughing as he stared at the pot-bellied 
country fellow holding the fresh five-dollar bill he had just gave him 
...... if that don't beat all said the city fellow ...... and he got in 
his big shiny car and pulled away smiling from ear to ear ...... 



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