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The Old Turkey Trot (standard:humor, 390 words)
Author: EveretAdded: Nov 30 2008Views/Reads: 1591/0Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
A wStory about a Thanksgiving Dinnr(Maybe)
 



Thanksgiving Dinner 

WELL TURKEY DAY PASSED and I WANNA TELL YOU WE HAD A TIME. YOU SEE THERE
WERE SOME WILD TURKEYS THAT HUNG AROUND OUR HOUSE AND I HAVE HAD MY EYE 
ON THEM ALL YEAR. A FEW DAYS BEFORE THANKSGIVING I DECIDED 

That  I WAS GOING TO HAVE ONE OF THOSE FOR MY THANKSGIVING DINNER. 
HECK. I THOUGHT. THEY ARE DUMB AND CAN'T FLY, SURELY THEY CAN'T RUN 
VERY FAST. THAT WAS A BIG ERROR IN JUDGEMENT ON MY PART. WELL HERE THEY 
CAME STROLLING ALONG MY BACK FENCE AND I KNEW I HAD IT MADE. "I'LL JUST 
WAIT TIL THEY GET TO THE CORNER AND I WILL HAVE THEM TRAPPED" 

THEY WERE GOING ALONG TALKING BACK AND FORTH AND NOT PAYING ANY
ATTENTION TO ME AT ALL AS I SLOWLY EDGED CLOSER AND CLOSER. SOON I WAS 
WITHIN TWENTY FEET OF THEM AND THEY STILL WERE NOT PAYING ANY ATTENTION 
SO THEN I MADE MY MOVE. 

I GOT CLOSER AND CLOSER THEN ALL HELL BROKE LOOSE. FIRST THEY TRIED TO
RUN, BUT THE CORNER WAS THERE AND THEN THEY ATTACKED ME IN A BUNCH. BOY 
I MEAN THE FEATHERS AND MY SKIN WERE FLYING IN ALL DIRECTIONS. THEM 
TURKEYS FLOGGED ME WITHIN AN  INCH OF MY LIFE AND I ENDED UP RUNNING(  
FAST AS AN 86 YEAR OLD CAN (WHICH IS MORE LIKE A SNAIL) WITH THEM 
COMING ON STRONG. AFTER ABOUT TWENTY FEET I RAN OUT OF GAS AND I 
THOUGHT THEY WERE GOING TO KILL ME. THEY WERE SQUAWKING AND PECKING AND 
CLAWING AND CARRYING ON AND I WAS YELLING FOR GOD OR SOMEONE TO SAVE MY 
WORTHLESS HIDE. 

I GUESS I WAS LUCKY WHEN MY NEIGHBOR, HEARING ALL THE NOISE CAME TO MY
RESCUE. HE GRABBED A TREE LIMB AND STARTED SWINGING IT AND SOON THE 
TURKEYS HAD ENOUGH AND DECIDED TO DEPART THE AREA. I KNOW ONE THING IF 
I EVER DECIDE TO GET A WILD TURKEY, I AM GOING TO BE WELL ARMED WITH 
HEAVY ARTILLERY AND HAVE LOTS OF PROTECTIVE GEAR  COVERING MY WITHERED 
BODY.( AND MAYBE HIRE A COUPLE OF BODY GUARDS FOR GOOD MEASURE).AND 
THAT IS WHY OUR TURKEY DINNER TURNED OUT TO BE HOTDOGS AND DIET 
PEPSI,WITH ME EATING FROM A WELL PADDED STOOL AND TAKING A LOT OF GUFF 
FROM THOSE WHO ENJOYED MY PAIN AND SUFFERING 


   


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