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I cry at weddings, too (standard:humor, 900 words)
Author: GodspenmanAdded: May 27 2012Views/Reads: 2396/1577Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
June is quite famous for the variety of nuptial activities. I am not sure exactly why June is the month of choice for these couples; I just go along with the flow. Consequently, through the years, I have officiated at many weddings during the month of Jun
 



June is quite famous for the variety of nuptial activities. I am not
sure exactly why June is the month of choice for these couples; I just 
go along with the flow. Consequently, through the years, I have 
officiated at many weddings during the month of June. 

I must confess that weddings are not my favorite form of activity. I had
much rather be doing something else, anything else, than officiating at 
the wedding ceremony of a young couple who are in love. 

When I first began this area of my pastoral work, I was very nervous. I
was concerned that people were watching and judging me and therefore I 
needed to have everything perfect. The day of the wedding found me an 
absolute nervous wreck. If it was not for several Apple Fritters that 
morning, I am not sure how I would get through the day. 

I feel that my personal inconvenience at these nuptial ceremonies
qualified me to indulge in eating several, if not many, Apple Fritters. 
Everybody needs something to help endure the inconveniences of life. 
Apple Fritter is my chosen remedy. 

I remember when I came to the shocking conclusion that nobody at the
wedding ceremony was watching me. The wedding ceremony was concluded 
and the reception was over and I was in the restroom washing my hands 
when I happened to look into the mirror. There to my chagrin I 
discovered that the back of my collar was not covering my tie. Nobody 
even hinted that I had a wardrobe malfunction. 

It was then I realized that nobody was paying any attention to me. I
could come to the wedding ceremony in a swimsuit and nobody would 
notice. Not that I have been tempted in this area, mind you. After all, 
the focus of the whole affair is the bride. 

Since this amazing discovery, weddings have not been quite so difficult
for me. I do not worry about my appearance because nobody else is 
worrying about my appearance. 

I often counsel young grooms who seem quite nervous that nobody is even
aware of their presence. Nobody comes to a wedding to see the groom. 
The only thing that really matters is the bride. 

After a wedding everybody always says, "Wasn't the bride beautiful?" Or,
"Didn't the bride look beautiful in her wedding dress?" 

I have yet to hear somebody say, "Wasn't that groom handsome?" Or, "I
loved the groom's tuxedo." It just never happens. This is the reason 
why every groom wears a rented tuxedo. Nobody is admiring him or his 
attire. 

The wedding dress is something altogether different. Very few brides
rent a wedding dress. Even though they are only going to wear it, 
supposedly, once in their lifetime, they all want to buy that special 
wedding dress. 

One reason I am not so very fond of weddings is the premarital
counseling involved. Of all the counseling I have given through the 
years, I am wondering if anybody ever paid attention to what I said. I 
think I could do the whole counseling session in pig Latin and the 
couple would sit there smiling at me as though they understood every 
word I was saying. 

With that in mind, I have tried through the years to make the counseling
sessions as long and painful as possible. If they can survive a series 
of premarital counseling sessions from me, then they deserve a lifetime 
of holy matrimonial bliss. 

One strange phenomenon I have seen in weddings throughout the years is
the number of people who cry at weddings. For some it may be 
overwhelmed with happiness. Others may be overwhelmed with memories of 
their own wedding. But the father of the bride is the one I watch. 

It is very hard for some of these fathers to keep back the tears, not
because they are losing a daughter, or because they are gaining a 
son-in-law, but because they are losing a whole lot of money on this 
wedding. 



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