let me live again.. (standard:Inspirational stories, 1160 words)
Author: stanley mcqueen kentucky backwoods writer	Added: Jul 23 2007	Views/Reads: 3201/2	Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
Man find peace in God

Backwoods writer Stanley mcqueen 

Let ME Live Again 

Time had brought me gray hair and a wrinkle face , most people don't
even live to seventy years old , But God has granted me this age, 
living on this little Kentucky farm and being married to the wife of my 
youth Sara who passed away about six years ago. Leaving me to a lonely 
cabin and four walls of despair, Our two son lived now up in Ohio and 
both married and with family of their own to tend two , the two visit 
some along and bring my grandchildren to see me and visit .but not so 
very long , My Sara was the love of my life , she was such a good soul 
and loving person and sickness took her away at the age of Sixty five , 
I was five years her senior and we had been married forty years, we 
together had run this farm growing corn and tobacco and raising what 
ever we could to make and honest dollar. I recall when the day ended in 
the summer time me and her would set on the porch stoop and watch the 
cattle pick along side the ridge that was before the cabin, we would 
talk about the farm and the crops and enjoy being able to live way out 
in the country side and not jammed up like other people are that live 
in tight settled places, many a warm summer day we would go fish in the 
river under the shade of the giant trees that over shadowed the green 
river that run through our land, I recall how excited she would get and 
the smile she had when she landed a big fish from the river, and how 
she would boast when she caught a bigger fish than me , I guess at her 
death I passed away also in heart, nothing interest me anymore nothing 
Is the same without her , it seems now I love in a null world of 
sadness and deep sorrow, ever things I see around the farm reminds me 
of her, Time has way of passing before we think and time will 
eventually find us all to its reality, yesterday I walked up to the 
point where I buried her and set on the bench I make and place along 
side her grave. Often I go there and set alone and recall the good 
times we had together as man and wife, how can a man live without his 
love, ? Why was she taken and why was I left behind ,? These thought 
haunted me and followed me as a shadow that was always with me .. 
Setting here beside her today at her grave im thinking on how much 
better I could have been to her, I could have helped her more and been 
more understanding as a man should toward his woman, thinking on how I 
had taken her for granted like most men do their loving wives, ever 
fuss we had every argument had come to my mind to haunt me and now with 
regret I would like to change the harsh words I uttered to her in rage 
of madness, why was these thoughts coming after she is gone , why was I 
being reminded of this now that I have no power to change? These 
thoughts continued to run threw my troubled mind, recalling what a good 
mother she had been in raising our two son , how she had cared and 
watched over the two like and eagle would its chicks. Recalling their 
childhood sicknesses how she would comfort them with a mother love and 
loving hand of motherhood, all these things was coming back to my mind 
now after she is gone, I recall the year that fever hit me and I was 
very sick near to dying and how she cooled my brow with cool spring 
water and help to live and not die, many things were being brought to 
light about how she has been toward me as a wife.. Sorrow is something 
hard to understand and hard to get rid of ...I recall how she would set 
before the lantern and read her Bible that was given to her from her 
mother that had been dead now for many years, if I could only have a 
little peace of mind about my life without her . How could I find this 
? How could I escape this trouble grief stuck mind.. Setting in the 
cabin and doing nothing something compelled me to pick up the Bible 
that she kept laying on a middle table of the shack, I picked it up and 
open it up and within I found where she had wrote some words and I 
began reading..it was to me a message , it read this my dearest husband 
when you read this I will be dead , I know that because sickness has 
befallen me and a sickness unto death, I want you to know that you have 
been a good husband a man that my heart loves to the end of my days. 
You gave me two son which is no greater gift could you have give me... 
our loved combine in the two of them ...it is my hope that when you 
read this that your heart is not filled with sorrow and grief that I 
have passed on... as you know my husband I have faith in the God that 
made these beautiful mountains that have sheltered  us and fed us its 
fruits.. My days have been wonderful as being your wife and best 
friend, husband don't think of me as being dead . Thinks of me as being 
in the present of the almighty God and before his throne..waiting on 
you to come to the place of peace and glory when no sorrow or death 
with ever enter its walls..it was God will that I die before you my 
husband , that this message would be written that you too would find 
grace and truth in God and that you too could live life again 
forevermore in the presents of the almighty God who would have all men 
to repent and not die but live forever more, with tears in my eyes I 
laid down the holy Bible I had in my hand and kneeled down and cried 
out unto God that I might live again , at these words there come a 
peace and joy inside my heart that I had ever felt before, the sorrow 
and grief was gone... then my thoughts are this even after she is gone 
she still has spoken to me threw her written words in the old family 
bible... now in my hearts mind I can see her standing waiting on me to 
come to her and live again in the presents of the lord God and his 
throne..... The end


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