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In life, an “account at the bank” can be a relative thing (standard:humor, 900 words)
Author: GodspenmanAdded: Jan 15 2012Views/Reads: 2389/1603Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
God does not make grandmothers like He once did. At least not like MY grandmother. Grandmother never trusted such things as banks with her money. Someone once told my grandmother, “If you would put your money in the bank, they would pay you interest.”
 



God does not make grandmothers like He once did. At least not like MY
grandmother. Grandmother never trusted such things as banks with her 
money. Someone once told my grandmother, “If you would put your money 
in the bank, they would pay you interest.” 

With a confused look on her face she responded, “I have enough interest
in my money, nobody else needs to bother about it.” That was that! 

After my grandfather died, my wife and I had the opportunity to take
grandma out for supper. It was a delightful restaurant and we thought 
it would be a real treat for her. More than once, I had to keep her 
from getting up and serving coffee to the rest of the people in the 
restaurant. After all, she did that at the church suppers. Why not 
here. “I've got two good legs,” she protested. 

Then came time to pay the check and the waiter brought the check and
laid it in front of me. I immediately took a credit card out of my 
wallet and laid it on the check. 

I could tell grandma had never seen a credit card before. 

“Put that away,” she said. “I believe that man wants you to pay for our
supper. Don't you have any money?” 

“I'm paying for our supper with my credit card,” I explained. 

“Oh, dear,” she moaned. “You know I don't believe in cards. Cards are of
the devil, and I have never had a deck of cards in my house. I'm a 
little surprised that you, a minister, would be fooling around with 
such things of the devil.” 

She insisted we tip the waiter in “good ole American cash.” I am not
sure if grandma ever really understood the credit card. She bought 
nothing on credit and did not accept credit. Everything had to be done 
in cash. She often quoted the scripture verse that says, “Owe no man 
any thing . . .” (Romans 13:8 KJV), which she took quite literally. 

As grandma got older, she began to rethink the business of opening a
bank account. Without telling anyone, she decided to go to the bank and 
open an account. She had saved up $50 for this purpose. Grandma 
nervously entered the bank and walked up to the man sitting at the desk 
marked “New Accounts.” 

“Good morning, Ma'am. I'm Gary Goodman. How can I help you today?” 

The man seemed pleasant enough, and grandma thought entrusting him with
the delicate job at hand was probably safe. 

“I wanna open an account,” she mumbled. 

“Fine. I'll get you all set up. It won't take but a few minutes.” With
that, he took out some papers and laid them on his desk in front of 
grandma. 

“Now,” he said, “let's begin. What is your name?” 

She told him. 

“O.K. What is your address?” 

“What?” 

“What is your address?” 

“Why do you need to know that?” 

“I'm just filling out the form, Ma'am.” 

The young man a little confused with her hesitancy said, “We can come
back to that. What is your date of birth?” 

Grandma's face turned a little red. “What do you want to know that for,”
she gasped? 

“I'm just filling out the forms. Can you give me your telephone number?”


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