Spotting Glimpses of Color (standard:poetry, 391 words)
Author: Lori	Added: Feb 08 2012	Views/Reads: 2461/1648	Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
This is the third poem in my Child Abuse series. Sometimes it's not about reliving the attack. It's about facing the mirror. Deciding what's a mirage and what's real.

Spotting Glimpses of Color 

As I sit here 

staring into the looking glass, 

smoking cigarette after cigarette 

I wonder why life has to have a past. 

~~ 

As I blow smoke rings 

out of my mouth I think back 

to all the nasty things I've done 

and wonder if there's really something I lack. 

~~ 

As my eyes lose focus, 

and my vision becomes blurred, 

horrible images flood my brain 

of a past best left undisturbed. 

~~ 

Childhood sexual abuse 

left a little girl lost 

in a woman's body who 

ultimately paid the cost. 

~~ 

Fuzzy pictures of being 

held down to a monster's bed 

having my panties ripped off 

another of wanting to be loved instead. 

~~ 

Foggy memories of tree houses, 

spider webs, and wooded trails 

all of which, today, leave me 

shaking, terrified, and pale. 

~~ 

Glaring balls of light 

keep much of the darkness at bay 

figure my mind can't take 

what happened those long ago days. 

~~ 

All I can remember 

is always waking up with pain 


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